Tuesday, November 18, 2014

The Many Levels of Engagement With the World

So we have to remain relevant to this world. Our main fear is that we may be forgotten, that no one remembers us. If no one remembers us, certainly no one loves us.

It's frightening.

So we do all that we can do to make ourselves (and the world) remember this fact - that we exist. Don't forget me.


We do things to be noticed. Our acts, our behavior, our clothes, our way of life, our tastes define us. We shout, we cry, we yell, we scream to draw attention to ourselves. (Now shouting can also happen by going silent - when everyone is shouting its best to draw attention by going silent.)

It consumes a lot of energy.

We have to go out to the mall, make a phone call, get on the mail, go to facebook, give an opinion, go to work, deal with people who may show some sign of noticing you.

Unfortunately most people are not noticing you still. You are just another wannabe. Superficial. Irrelevant.

So we scale up our need to be recognised. We shout louder, we put more blog posts, more outrageous fb comments, wear different clothes, speak a different language that shocks, get more degrees, get that beautiful partner, get money. Are you noticing me? Are you? Are you? Why aren't you?

We stare at the mail, at the fb account, at the mobile, at people. Nothing. We resign ourselves to our fate. We accept the mediocrity, the shallowness in us. We settle and move away from the mainstream. We give up. Some times.

It is this need. To be recognised as the perfect, correct bunch of intentions. That we are trying too. That we are also great in our hopes and our thoughts and even our acts. But no one seems to see it. We love the greatness in those celebrities who reflect our innermost ideas of greatness. We detest the faults of those villains who exhibit  our deepest and hidden faults. We justify our existence just in case someone notices us - and says 'hey, you got it all wrong'. That our whole construct of life has been wrong. That we totally missed the bus.

Too mush is at stake. My whole life will have no meaning.

This construct has to be held on to. Beyond this we don't have anything to offer, to justify. We cannot handle that loss of illusion.

If you ask me, we are barking up the wrong tree.

I think it's a bit too much to invest in the outside world. To please others we are twisting and adjusting, making ourselves smaller, cutting ourselves up, mutilating ourselves. And still the world is not satisfied.

It never will be.

Because the world only reflects us. If we are not satisfied, how can the world be? It is we who must first look at ourselves and say - this - what I see here in the mirror is enough. Whatever this is - this is right. I have nothing more to offer. And more importantly - nothing less. I will be what I am.

The paradox. The moment you let go of the world, the world wants you. It loves you. It loves the fact that you let it go. That you walked away and had the guts to be what it is not being. When you don't need it anymore, it needs you. It clings on to you. How? How did you crack it? Tell us. Please. What is the secret.

Nothing really. I stopped looking at you to give. I realised that even I can give. I will give what I have. Like Sudama. It makes me feel better.

That is the secret. I see value in myself. I don't need you to see this value in me. To certify my existence. To be nice to me, so I can be nice to you. You see, I can be nice to myself.

Unfortunately, we as humans are mostly on this curve. Of wanting the world to approve. This presents the opportunity - the perfect business opportunity where we are all sellers and buyers - as long as this dissatisfaction exists.  

The lasting business fundamental then is to address this core need of humanity and its many manifestations. That we understand your need (dissatisfaction?) to grow. To be recognised. To improve. To show what you are truly made of. We will address that need to express, to be better, to promote yourself or better still, to feel secure about yourself. You can express yourself softly, loudly, through words, through colors, through opinions, through your creations. And we will facilitate it all. And each time we will say we recognise you and your grand effort. We are with you. We will live your life with you. In clothes, in perfumes, in food, in soft drinks, in televisions, in mobile phones.

Pick your level of engagement. Scale yourself up through this dissatisfaction with yourself. Explore it deeply until you make peace with this dissatisfaction. Every dissatisfaction offers a need, a product. Scope. Opportunities.

Again, this satisfaction, like love and happiness, cannot be found outside. It has to be found inside. (But to go inside we must first engage with the outside until we realise that it is not working with any lasting effect - the perfume wears off, the smiles fade, the clothes tear, the jokes stop, the food kills.)

And then it all drops off. And there is peace. 


Hmmm said...

Hello Sir, have a feeling that this is one of your better posts (not sure if I'm the one who can judge and definitely not sure why anyone should compare any two posts...) Just glad I read this. :)

Harimohan said...

Thanks Hmmm. It could well be. I am looking at this article from many levels - like Mr. Nolan does. Glad you liked reading it.