Thursday, September 16, 2021

Thought for the Day - Self-Love Is Being Seen as We Are

 So this is a definition of self-love that finally fits in with everything. Self-love is being seen exactly as we are without our fig leaves, without our judgments about ourselves.


That's why self-love takes us to our potential. All that we hide, all the we do not do because we have judgments on it, or because we are afraid to be seen like that, are parts of us we don't love. No self-love, no full potential.

Self-love then, is the way to uncovering you at full potential.

Connecting this with another thought I had recently about us being at full potential - that we are not at full potential as long as we feel uncomfortable with ourselves i.e. do not do certain things where we think we don't look good. But its our judgment and it is precisely in doing those things that we give ourselves the biggest chance.

When we make the announcement that we are ready.   

Thought for the Day - There's a Beauty In Your Breathing that Makes Life Easy

 Breath - the sign that we are alive. Another thing I heard was that breathing was the connection between mind and the body. And then we realise that there's more than the mind and the body - there's spirit. And then, this spirit reaches out to the universal spirit outside.


The breath seems to be the connecting factor here. It's not just some involuntary thing that keeps us alive. It's bigger than that.

When I go jogging (at my own small pace) I feel that I need to focus on something. AT times I try to count the steps and occupy my mind so it doesn't play tricks and tire me out. I use other tricks like focusing on some physical part - which is another way to distract the mind.

Until I found the other day that I could probably use my breath to control the whole system. My body, mind, spirit - find that balance when they are in sync. The only place that one can do that is with the breath I thought. So I started focusing on my breath and let my breath decide what's the right pace for me, what pace makes me happy, and voila, I stopped thinking about all these other thoughts. I just need to ask my breath to lead and tell me what makes me happy and it does that - this pace, this distance - and then we feel the awareness of the breath going and we come back and it guides us again.

I feel that I can ask my breath what I need to do to make me happy now and it will guide me, or what I need to do right now to make the right decision and it will guide me. At times I breath in good stuff and breath out stuff I don't want.

I am having fun with my focus on my breath. I would like to make it more and more conscious until it becomes subconscious and I am always aware of my breath.

Sounds like the present to me.           

Wednesday, September 15, 2021

Lean In - Sheryl Sandberg

Sheryl Sandberg was an ex- Googler and CEO of Facebook. The book is all about how women should lean in more into leadership positions because they have a lot to offer and I fully agree. I remember reading somewhere about how a company changed its policy towards race (could be gender for this example) and by making that one change, added a 50% new angle to their business (resulted in actual growth). Keeping women out with all their wonderful strengths and special characteristics means we keep out 50% of our strength.



But why do we do that?

Simply because we are led by insecure people, insecure men, who cannot handle women and the power and beauty and compassion they bring with them. For centuries we have been led by insecure people (and continue to be) which is why the world landed in the place it is in - war, climate change, inequality - all caused by bullies of the world. Bring in the women, bring in the empaths and the world will be a completely different place.

Filled with some lovely anecdotes from her own life and from people she has met with and interacted, Sheryl discusses issues like how women feel discrimination at the work place (being like the boys, no separate toilets, no parking for pregnant mothers), how their husbands need to reach out and help in and not see it as a favour, be an equal partner, how women themselves need to step forward and claim what is rightfully theirs. She puts forward her own case and how everything can be managed by figuring ways and putting limitations in (lady who put her children to bed with uniform is a classic case) and how women need not leave jobs because of family or kids - they just leave because they think they cannot manage it. Sheryl says they can. She is proof of it.

It's a fine book and one that does a lot for women who are confused about the many things they feel they have to handle on their own. Sheryl lays it bare and gives practical solution. Here's to a more equal, peaceful and harmonious world with more women in leadership positions - something I hope this book will do. And by doing so, reduce the level of insecurity in the world!            

 

Thought for the Day - If You're Comfortable, You're Not Doing Enough

 This is for those of us who feel there's a lot to be done but nothing is happening. We live in our comfort zone and don't push the boundary and well - nothing happens.


If we're wanting things to change and we are doing things that are comfortable - we are not doing enough. We need to push that boundary until things shake up, things change and doors open. We have to do at least one thing in the day that we are postponing, that makes us uncomfortable - to grow. to go past this barrier.

There will come a time when nothing makes us uncomfortable and we are comfortable with the uncomfortable - that's the level we need to aspire for. Until then, push that boundary, inch by inch.

   

Tuesday, September 14, 2021

Artist Date 1 - Necklace Road and Boat Ride to Buddha Purnima

 I have been struggling with the artist date for weeks now and today I finally decided to go - even for half an hour. I decided to go to Necklace Road and perhaps do my walk there. I parked at Eat Street at about 430 and went and had a cup of coffee from Minerva. Some college kids, some families were around. A guy came and yelled 'Boating, Boating'  and completely ignored me - single, gray haired chaps are not ideal for boating perhaps. I thought about it. I never liked boating, nor any water sports. Perhaps my lack of confidence in my swimming ability perhaps. I decided to see what this is and walked to the quay. I asked the guy what this was about - a launch like thing, a 15 minute ride to the Buddha statue, a 10 minute stop and back. 50 bucks. I paid.

Boating from Eat Street

I put on a life jacket and sat up front. the boat took off. I sent a pic to Shobhs in case the boat went down. It didn't.

Boat

 We landed up at the Buddha statue. First time I have been here ever.

Buddha

First time inside the Hussain Sagar too in forty years. Anyway took pics of the statue and walked around. 

Buddha statue

Apparently the statue was consecrated by His Holiness the Dalai Lama. The return journey was uneventful.

Back at Eat Street I decided to do my walk - went for a 40 minute walk along the Necklace Road.

Two affectionate brothers selling balloons - the older one adored his younger brother (half hidden)

Lovers, friends, loners checking phones, balloon sellers,ice cream sellers, an ice cream seller who was busily clearing up garbage thrown near his cart (why was he doing that), two young kids selling balloons (the older one was perhaps seven and his younger brother must be four - the older one loved the younger one), two young friends aged eight sitting on the rails, one middle aged lady walking for exercise, a shy couple playing badminton in overgrown grass instead of the open space, the cries of Ganpati revellers heading to immerse their idols, horseback policemen, bhutta sellers. Nice.

Walk

Walk

Enough sights and images for the evening.

So many moments of pleasure for children - lying waste 

It took all of two hours. Two lovely hours. I felt I liked my own company. I am quite fun you know - must be something if I made myself do something I didn't do with anyone else all these years.

A mosque
 I am looking forward to more artist dates. They are brilliant. 

The Artist's Way - Julia Cameron

Julia Cameron's, known as the Godmother of Creativity, wrote this book which is a kind of a bible in the artists' journey. She has written 40 books - fiction, non-fiction, poetry, is a songwriter, filmmaker and playwright. Her books have sold 5 million copies and have been translated into 48 languages. Enough credentials on creativity.


Creativity is the natural order of life she says. When we open ourselves to creativity we open ourselves to the creator. Our refusal to be creative is counter to our nature. When we are creative, gentle, powerful change is to be expected. It's never too late to be creative so stop fearing and start.

Julia gives two powerful tools which are the most important part of the book. They are:

Morning Pages - 

The first tool is Morning Pages (I have been doing for more than a month now and vouch for) is writing 3 pages of long hand, strictly stream of consciousness stuff, whatever comes to mind. (Nobody reads your morning pages.) If you can't think of anything write 'I cannot think of anything...I am blank..' like that. You have to write morning pages every day forever, as early in the morning as you can. Don't look for perfectionism, don't censor, let it flow. Morning pages is a tool of creative recovery. (She says  its a way of sending messages to the universe, notifying the universe of your dreams and hopes) 

Artist Date

This is a tool for receiving. Take two hours off with your artist self (and no one else) - just you and your artist self. A play date. Go walk, go to  a museum, mall, gallery, nature - just you and you. I found this tougher to do and I am still struggling with it.  If the morning pages are about sending messages, the artist date is about receiving from the universe. Don't miss this.

Fill the well

She also talks of filling the well with images. Art is born in attention she says. Any regular, repetitive action primes the well. Our focused attention is critical to filling the well - we can do it while driving, walking, bathing. Art is imagination at play.

I like that part about attention - what you pay attention to grows.

The book in itself is a work book with thoughts and exercises to do over 12 weeks. Each week has a theme that gently takes you from coming out of a space where your creativity is blocked to finally being in flow. The weekly themes are about recovering a sense of safety, identity, purpose, integrity, possibility, abundance, connection, strength, compassion, self-protection, autonomy and faith.  

Week 1 - Recovering a sense of safety. 

There's nothing wrong with you.

We hide our creative selves in shadows thanks to our negative beliefs. We must begin by protecting the artist child within, identify core negative beliefs like 'cannot be successful, artists are poor' etc - which are not true. Then work on changing our beliefs by using affirmations and other processes.
Exercises for the first week include morning pages, artist dates, naming 3 attackers of our self worth, writing a letter to one of them, identifying 3 champions of our self-worth, writing a thank you letter, listing our imaginary lives, going on a walk with yourself.

Week 2 - Recovering a sense of identity

Reclaim yourself. 

Stop self-attack and stop being manipulated by guilt. As 'blocked creatives' we are normally good game for attacked by crazy makers - people who break deals, expect special treatment, spend your time and money, blame etc - basically those who make us feel lousy. Avoid these people. Stop feeling guilty, like you did something wrong, like you're a fraud. Instead reclaim your space, pay attention to what's around you, talk about it. Take pride in yourself, your dreams, your life.
Tasks for this week include doing time audit to check if you have been out helping others or yourself, listing 20 things you enjoy doing every day, doing two favorite things this week. Affirmations, and listing our imaginary lives.

Week 3 - Recovering a Sense of Purpose

Work and doors open.

As we do work towards recovering our blocked creative we experience synchronicity - it shows up as answered prayers (don't sabotage it). Take small steps in the direction of the dream and watch the synchronous doors open. Leap and the net appears, walk and the way appears.
Take risks, meet opportunity half way. 'Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it', Action has magic, grace and power in it. She warns that we are all shamed as creatives - so be careful. Deal with criticism (creativity is the only cure for criticism) Growth comes in solitude, in quiet time.

Exercises for week three include imagining the childhood room, recalling 5 traits of yours as a child, 5 childhood accomplishments, habits, nurturing friends, 5 people you admire.

Week 4 - Recovering a Sense of Integrity

Stop pretending, get real. Open yourself up.

This is time for honest changes, for spiritual surrender. Let go of the past, of pretences. Creativity is grounded in reality. Art lies in the moment of encounter. Reopen buried dreams. Practice reading deprivation - inner silence. for one week.

Tasks -write a letter to you at 8, do an extended artists date, throw out the no good outfits

Week 5 - Recovering a sense of possibility

Don't get caught in the virtue trap. Listen to the inner guide. List a wish list.  

Week 6 - Recovering a sense of abundance

Your are born to be abundant. Write about god, about what is luxury to you. See how you spend your money. Serious art is born from serious play. Tasks for the week - send postcards to 5 fiends

Week 7 - Recovering a sense of connection

Try, try, do, do.

Listen more, pay attention. Don't get stuck in perfectionism. Perfectionism is  refusal to move ahead . I loved the quote "Don't fear mistakes, there are none" - Miles Davis. If you didn't fear doing it perfectly you would have tried. Tasks for the week - Treating myself like a precious object will make me strong

Week 8 - Recovering a sense of strength

Dealing with failure -don't give up

Art is the act of structuring time. Look at every loss, as gain disguised as a loss. think how can this loss serve me? Take the next small step instead of waiting for the next large one. Write one page at a time. Creativity requires activity. Tasks - goal search.

Week 9 - Recovering a sense of compassion

Be gentle with yourself, never be harsh to yourself

Remember it's not laziness but fear that blocks you. Use love to cure fear. Enthusiasm is grounded in play, not work. Watch out for creative U turns (don't let go) Don't commit hara kiri on the eve or in the wake of your first creative victory. Its scary but blast through the block. Remove resentment. Get fear out, love in. Forgive yourself, others

Week 10 - Recovering a sense of self protection

Don't sabotage your success

Watch out for workaholism. Fame. Competition. They are all potholes.

Week 11 -Recovering a sense of autonomy

Enjoy success

Accepting cash flow, self respect. Success. The sex of sports. run, play, exercise. Keep the flow going physically, have fun. 

Week 12 - Recovering a sense of faith

Stay with the process

Trust the process. Be in a space of I-don't-know. Mystery imagination at play. Escape velocity. Watch out for wet blankets, set goals, set boundaries.

Some spaces need to be filled in. I gave a gist but you can read the book and do all the exercises which I haven't done yet but propose to. I started on the basic tools - Morning Pages and the Artist Date and loved them both. I'll revisit this page. But if there's two things to take away take those two practices. And buy the book. It's something people apparently keep revisiting every now and then to write blockbuster stuff. And yes, i do feel I am getting more ideas now than before.

           

 

Canteen Fundas - Commit Your Contribution to be Consistent

Not consistent? Commit your minimum committed contribution and go for it.

https://www.edexlive.com/opinion/2021/sep/11/e-canteen-fundascommit-your-contribution-for-consistent-performance-23927.html


E-Canteen Fundas: Commit your contribution for consistent performance


‘Our basketball team’s fully set,’ said Rahul. ‘We’ve a common purpose, clarity of roles and are fully aligned.’

‘But you’re not consistent,’ said Rinku. ‘Some days you play brilliantly, other days you suck. Something’s wrong.’

‘Rinku’s right,’ said Rakesh. ‘You must convert what you have into consistent results. You can’t simply hope.’

‘How do we do that bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul.

‘To deliver consistently, commit what each one will contribute to the team and hold yourself responsible for it,’ said Rakesh, adding, ‘Do you do that?’

‘We don’t explicitly commit bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘We believe everyone’s doing their best.’

‘That’s what most of teams do,’ said Rakesh. ‘But good intentions don’t translate to concrete results. A better way is to commit to a clear contribution. That way you’ll find ways and deliver to potential.’

‘How do we go about it bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul.

‘Ask everyone in your team to set their own targets on what they’ll deliver and share it with the team,’ said Rakesh. ‘When it all adds up you have a team that performs consistently.’

‘Hmm, but what if they set a target that’s too low or high?’ asked Rinku.

‘Good question,’ said Rakesh. ‘A good target focuses all your resources towards achieving your target. A low target’s not challenging enough because it uses only a part of your resources. And a very high target makes you give up because it feels impossible. The ideal target’s in the sweet spot — beyond what you think is possible, yet tangible enough to excite. A challenge that stretches you. So discuss and arrive at well set targets that utilise all your unused potential.’

‘Bhaiyya, what if someone sets too high a target that they’ll fail?’ said Rinku. ‘What about their commitment to the team then?’

‘Have two goals then,’ said Rakesh. ‘One committed goal and one aspirational goal. If the team needs 20 committed points and the player thinks he can do 35 great, go for 35, but deliver 20 without fail.’

‘Bhaiyya, we never committed to targets,’ said Rahul. ‘Won’t it put too much pressure and affect performance?’

‘No,’ said Rakesh. ‘On the other hand, a publicly committed target makes you examine your process towards becoming better players. You’ll be forced to use resources you already have at your disposal to deliver consistently, including the group wisdom of your team. As a team you can help each other achieve more and improve the team performance. You will play to your potential.’

‘True bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘I can see how this practice of committing targets and holding ourselves responsible to deliver consistently can help our team perform better.’

Pro Tip: Commit concrete performance delivery to your team by setting yourself challenging targets. It will improve performances – individual and the team’s. When you commit, you reexamine your process, use all resources efficiently and deliver consistently.

Monday, September 13, 2021

Thought for the Day - All That Comes in the Way of You and Your Potential is What's Not You

 I always wondered what it means when they say 'be yourself' to be successful. I thought I was being myself by being what I was. But then it made sense when I looked at it like this.

I know what comes between me and my full potential. I have certain judgments about how I am, how I should be and how I will do some things and not do some things. Now that's exactly what is 'not me'. All that holds me back from being at full potential is what's not me.

When I drop that face, that pretense, that judgment - all that holds me back - I will be free to be myself at full potential. Now to drop them off - one by one.

And be me.

Security - Movie

 2021. Italian. A rather complex story about a complex family and even more complicated neighbours and townspeople - likely to end up where it ended with such complicated people around. Avoid.



Pinky Memsaab- Movie

 2018. Pakistani film. A simple story about a girl from a village who's deserted by her husband for not bearing children and ends up as a maid in Dubai. How her mistress trains her and helps her set high ambition and how she also teaches her mistress about the values of family is the rest of the story. I loved it. What I saw of Pakistan was beautiful. And a nice insight into Dubai too.

Watch.


 

Thursday, September 9, 2021

Thought for the Day - Your Objective Should be You at Full Potential

 While setting objectives in the Take off program I realised a 10x goal does not come easy. We look at wishy washy goals that are in our comfort zone, we look at activity based goals mistaking activity for impact, and we end up doing a lot of activity with very little impact.



One insight here is this - whatever you are doing currently - what is it at full potential? If you assess your work or passion at full potential you get a fair sense of where you are playing in the spectrum - you could be only using 10% or 20% of your potential. So, the way to get to the 10x Objective is like this - slide the work you are doing up the impact scale until you start feeling uncomfortable - scared. It should be scary. But the key question also is this - it should be something you really want. Would I like 100,000 clients paying Rs 10 for my gyan? I would love to.  So stay with that objective and then we'll figure a way to get there.

Like I discussed yesterday - at first the idea is so out of our consciousness that it may take a day or two to settle down into our consciousness. And then we see how it can be achieved.

There's always a way. 

So get started on setting that scary objective that will catapult your life into the next level, that 10x objective. 

Wednesday, September 8, 2021

Anjali - Sona and Zor Again

 Went to  Beauty Green with Vasu today and decided to buy some rice and biscuits for the family and check in on the two. When we first went the gate was shut and no one was opening it but through the crack I could see the two -Sona and Zor - lying regally in the ground.

I went with Choudary after sometime and this time the man was around - he was outside with his four year old. The two pups were out two. They saw me and came running - Sona went into her usual wriggly poises while Zor maintained a safe distance. I noticed that Sona's leash was off and Zor's was on. When I asked him he said Sona was more free and playful while Zor was still scared. I asked him to remove the leash from Zor as well so she won't get stuck somewhere. He did.

Sona in the foreground, Zor in the back


The two however stayed their distance. I gave the biscuit packet and the kid gave them the biscuits which they gobbled up. They fought with each other playfully as they did at home. The man said they now stay with them inside their room. They looked comfortable - like a family. Apparently the kid plays with them. I finally felt happy knowing that they found a nice home. It's a young family and I know they have all bonded well together. The premises is large and there's a lot of open spaces around.

Nicee!

And hey, they got new names - Sona is Tommy and Zor is Jimmy! Though they don't respond to any name anyway.       

A Small MCC Reunion

 Chandra was in town so we planned an MCC reunion - a small one. Ram, Ranjan and I went and picked up Chandra at Hotel Minerva in Secunderabad and drove to the MLJ Cricket Academy where we knocked around a few balls. Bhupinder helped us and we all enjoyed playing around for an hour.

Pavan, Suri, Ranjan, Me, Chandra and Ram

At 7, Pavan, Subbu and Suri landed up and we all went to Yatri Nivas for dinner and drinks. Old games were recalled and many fun memories from almost 25 years ago were relived. In 1994 we won the League championship and we repeated the same in 1997. Those were fun days and like I say, the feeling of having accomplished something together is something else.

Six of us in the above pic are here - spot them!

As always we planned a bigger get together. I am hoping we do it soon.   

Anjali - Sona and Zor Look Happy

 We were still thinking about the frisky twosome and Anjali asked me how they were. I asked Sadiq to take pictures of the two and send because during my last visit I did not see them. Sadiq went and took pictures of the two - still with their leashes and collars on and looking quite healthy and fine.

Sona in the foreground, adventurous as ever, Zor, worrying in the background






Sona and Zor - Awesome twosome




Thought for the Day - What's Not in Your Consciousness Will Never Grow You

 While doing the 10x work on the Take Off program I realised this - what's within our consciousness (I use it loosely to mean what we know is possible and true for us - like our normal life) cannot grow us not excite us, nor does it allow us to use all our resources. You see our resources are also dynamic and we can never stay quiet thinking we're at full potential. 

The only way to reach for our full potential is to constantly seek what's outside our consciousness. And that's what Take Off or the 10x idea does. Take your normal 1x and push it all the way to the end of the scale - 10x. If your idea of a vacation is going to Munnar, think Maldives, if you drive a Santro think a 20 lakh car, if your income is 1x think 10x. Now all these ideas completely shake you out of your comfort zone, put you in a tizzy, make you want to defend yourself and even get angry at the person who suggested this.

The idea is pretty simple - as long as you believe its out of your reach it will be. But if you just think of it as a possibility and say - hey it would be nice to go to Maldives - you realise that you start thinking how. You may be upset for a day but the next day the idea seeps into your consciousness and once it comes down into your universe - you have half created it. It will take on an energy of its own.

So look at your life, look at what's bothering you, and instead of compromising, go 10x. It will bring the idea into your consciousness which makes it now within reach. Its in your universe - now if you want it, you can take it. So go 10x, go beyond your universe of possibility and download stuff from above. Put it on the wish list. Look at it everyday. 

Until it starts unfolding into your reality.   

Gunshot - Movie

 Watched this fabulous movie on Netflix. Starts with a dead body from protests in Egypt being sent for an autopsy and how the truth unfolds. Loved it. I am loving watching these international films and the perspective they give into their cultures.

Watch.




Book Club - Movie

 2018. Four friends on the other side of fifty read '50 Shades of Grey' as part of their Book Club reading and find their lives changing. Light comedy.

   


Monday, September 6, 2021

Canteen Fundas - The Team Must Come Together Like a Fist For Max Effect

 The team must be fully aligned together - like a FIST...for maximum effect!

https://www.edexlive.com/opinion/2021/sep/04/e-canteen-fundas-heres-why-good-teams-should-come-together-like-a-fist-23786.html


E-Canteen Fundas: Here's why good teams should come together like a fist


Pro Tip: For best results, your team must align like a fist. Every member should know and perform their roles in alignment for the team purpose. No one is greater or smaller.



‘We’re having problems with Nishi,’ said Rahul. ‘He’s our star player but his attitude is affecting our basketball team.’ 

‘What’s the problem?’ asked Rinku.

‘He’s not playing for the team,’ said Rahul. ‘He plays for himself. He does not pass to others, wants to score for himself. It’s affecting the team morale. The others are getting demotivated. What to do?’

‘Interesting dilemma,’ said Rakesh. ‘Should the star player with a bad attitude come first or should the team come first?’ 

‘We have to keep the star bhaiyya,’ said Rinku. ‘Else we will lose.’

‘Ah Rinku,’ said Rakesh. ‘The sum is greater than the parts as Aristotle said. The team carries a bigger punch when it comes together than what its individual parts are capable of, however strong they may be. The team is bigger than the individual.’

‘But bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘He scores half our score. How can we drop him?’

‘Look,’ said Rakesh. ‘If he starts playing for the team, your team will score much more because the others also start performing. Instead of one person scoring 50 and the other four scoring 10, we have 5 players scoring 20 each. No good team depends only on one or few players. They all share the burden. That’s what makes the team resilient.’ 

‘How does that work bhaiyya?’ asked Rinku.

‘Imagine that your fist is your team,’ said Rakesh. ‘Now, hit this punching bag with everything you got. Can you hit it with full power’ 

‘Yes bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘I gave it my best shot. Full power.’

‘Great,’ said Rakesh. ‘Now take one finger out of alignment from the rest of the fist and punch again. How hard can you hit it this time?’

‘Less than 50 per cent force bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘If I hit harder I could damage my fingers and hand.’

‘That’s what happens when your team does not come together like a fist,’ said Rakesh. ‘Every part is important for the team to be at full potential. When one goes out of alignment, it damages the entire team.’

‘Whoa,’ said Rinku. ‘So what should Rahul do bhaiyya?’

‘See, most teams don’t understand the importance of coming together and respecting one another,’ said Rakesh. ‘So first explain to your players that the team is bigger than the individuals and everyone benefits when the team wins. Teams are stronger because it’s members are interdependent, holding one another up, and not acting independently. And if your star still does not align after that, replace him. You’ll see your team performing better without him.’

‘Thanks bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘I’ll get all my teams – at home, college and play – together like a FIST.’

Pro Tip: For best results, your team must align like a fist. Every member should know and perform their roles in alignment for the team purpose. No one is greater or smaller.

Thought for the Day - The World Ain't Logical

 The world is not rational or logical - that's only to convince ourselves. The ones that get away and make it are those who don't subscribe to this. They merely change the rules.


Think about it - nothing you see around you makes sense logically. Don't waste your time on finding meanings, explanations. Just go after what you want, without putting any rules of logic or rationality to it. It works best.

That's why they call such things magic - simply because there's no visible explanation. Go for big. Don't waste your time figuring it out. Go with what you have and that's more than you need.

Thought for the Day - Each Time You Play the Victim, You're Not Yourself

 I was wondering about this thought - how do I know when I am truly 'myself'? I heard many successful people say - be yourself and that is all you need to be. I would wonder when I was not being myself and how 'being myself' shows up.


It struck me the other day that I am not being myself when i am playing the victim - that's the first sign of not being myself. I feel that this draws me away so much from what I really am because I think I choose a lazy way of getting by. A seemingly lazy way that actually takes me away from an easier way, a more efficient way that gives more for less.

Give up the victim role first, and you're pretty much yourself.

More on this later.

Thursday, September 2, 2021

eCanteen Fundas - Define Your Role and Play it Well

 Know your role, expand your role and play it well!

https://www.edexlive.com/opinion/2021/aug/28/e-canteen-fundasplay-every-role-like-its-an-oscar-winning-one-23586.html


E-Canteen Fundas: Play every role like it’s an Oscar-winning one



Pic: Edexlive

I landed a supporting role in the college play,’ said Rinku.

‘Nobody will notice you if you’re not the lead,’ said Rahul. ‘You should quit.’

‘Rahul, she’s part of a team effort,’ said Rakesh. ‘Just like you’re part of your basketball team and want your team to win, I’m sure Rinku wants to be part of a successful play too.’

‘Of course, bhaiyya,’ said Rinku.

‘You can’t be part of successful teams by not putting your heart and soul into your role,’ said Rakesh. 
‘Are you playing your role to the best of your capability in teams that you’re part of, Rahul?’

‘What teams?’ asked Rahul. ‘I’m only on my basketball team.’

‘How about your family, friends, college and society?’ asked Rakesh, ‘Where you play the role of a son, student, friend, citizen and human? If we’re not aware of our roles, we’re like actors standing on stage but not playing our part.’

‘But what are we supposed to do, bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul. ‘No one told us what roles are or what’s expected from us.’

‘Roles are about expectations,’ said Rakesh. ‘For any team effort to be successful, every member must know what’s expected of them. The director of your play or the captain—your team must define everyone’s roles so you can perform to expectations. Most times, our roles are not clearly defined which is why we hang about aimlessly instead of putting our heart and soul into it.’

‘What should we do then, bhaiyya?’ asked Rinku.

‘Whatever part is given to you, define your role clearly for yourself,’ said Rakesh. ‘That way, you play your role to the best of your capability. Then, you can expand your role to help others and contribute to help your team succeed. Remember, every role, big or small, is equally important in team effort.’

‘Yes, bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘The sweeper in our building, Ramesh, takes on the role of making our premises the cleanest and finds ways to beautify the place. It’s so uplifting for all of us.’

‘And there’s Nisha who got dropped from our play,’ said Rinku. ‘Instead of cribbing, she took on the role to help us out. I’ll now define my roles in teams, expand my role and contribute to a
successful team effort. I see how it helps both me and the team.’

PRO TIP: Define your role clearly for yourself so that you do your best in every team effort you’re part of. Then, expand your role and contribute to the success of your team.

Tuesday, August 31, 2021

Sensitive is the New Strong - Anita Moorjani

Anita Moorjani, the bestselling author of 'Dying to be Me' and someone who has made her Near Death Experience  (NDE) an experience to change the world now writes about the world of the empaths, the ones who feel excessively for others at great cost to themselves. But she says that when we understand how empaths work we can actually bring all their wonderful qualities to work and make empathetic leaders who can make this world a better place. That's why 'Sensitive is the New Strong'.


Let's look at what empaths are like. They often make themselves invisible, absorb everyone else's energy, have this sixth sense of knowing when others are in distress. Empaths can make a huge difference if they are empowered, stay connected to their centre, allow themselves to inspire others and mainly protect themselves. Anita differentiates between being sensitive and being an empath - empaths feel and absorb others energies, become people pleasers who are continuously rescuing and helping people, who make others needs more important that their own to the point of exhaustion. They are what she calls six sensory people in a five sensory world. 

Anita gives a quiz of about 34 questions - on the scale of an empath. I scored between 20-28 which is second highest (need protection from others energies). Now the question is - is it good or bad? Empaths being sensitive people are highly averse to criticism, are addicted to approval, have negative thoughts and get physical reactions and behave like doormats. They do not like crowded paces, loud noises, are non-confrontationist. Anita urges empaths to claim back their power without losing their empathy - focus on your inner guidance she says, say no without feeling guilty, stop feeling like a victim and claim control over your life. To make friends with conflict instead of avoiding it.

If you block your sensitivity you block whats coming in from the other realm. Tune in, turn inward, realise the gift you have for caring she says. To improve our relationship with ourselves Anita suggest we tune in and find inner guidance from the inner mystic. You feel more guided, get insights, moments of rare clarity if we get in touch through meditation, or just keeping calm and focusing on our breath. Anita says the inner world is real so be present for guidance. Clear your emotional baggage - forgiving, gratitude, anything that elicits a feeling of lightness, relief or liberation.

Our natural state if one of freedom and liberation. Anita's own motto is to live fearlessly. To strengthen energies she says we must protect our aura, run our energies, find inaction in action and believe that gentleness will overpower strength.

An interesting observation which I read recently in another book is that the ego is good because it gives us a sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Value your ego because self-care is important. Don't feel disempowered because no one has more authority on your life than you.

A lovely line -being passive is when others decide for you, being aggressive is when you decide for others and assertive is when you decide for yourself.

Anita says when our ego is low, our ability to receive goes down so dial it up and when we can give, our common awareness is dialled up. This can show up in our financial position in many ways. We cannot talk about ourselves, cant say no, feel undeserving, shy away form leadership. To counter all this develop a healthy ego. Embrace the many unique and individual traits (don't second guess and give your power away). Follow your own heart. Be compassionate without feeling guilty or sorry.

Anita urges us to be in connect with our inner mystic. To be centred all we need to do is to do nothing but focus on our breath for 10-15 minutes. do nothing. get guidance. Trust your intuition. Whether its a personal dilemma or a health issue - quiet your mind, breathe and turn inward. Focus on wellness, not the illness. 

To protect yourself and to love yourself, engage with those who are loving and appreciative towards you. Self-care is important because when our life energies are high we can lift others. we laugh more, we feel lighter. Don't take on the problems of others - its not our responsibility. Thrive, so you can help.

The 4 Keys to Healing are

1) Ask, what I can say no to

2) Learn to open your receiving channels

3) Get excited about life

4) How can I support my body

Optimise your life energy.

In our relation to the world we go through two stages 1) become aware you're an empath and 2) relate to the world and interpret the daily life around us. Since we live in a world that may not understand us focus on self-love, connect to your inner mystic, listen to you intuition, keep life energy high.

For better health feel higher states of energy. Understand you are not your body, race, image, culture or gender. Don't be fear-based, be love-based. Spend time alone talking to yourself, listen to messages that make you feel cared for, positive and loved. following higher voice makes you feel loved, recharges your batteries (where fear drains you, criticism causes guilt and anger). 

Open to abundance without guilt. Empaths are in tune with the rhythm of the universe and are in best position to channel money and power. But if we are in survival mode we don't have the resources to create solutions (center yourself, breathe, connect to the web of consciousness, see things differently, spark creativity). Live fearlessly.

Once you let go of the fear of judgment by others things change. 'When you charge what you deserve, you attract people who are happy to pay for your services, people you enjoy working with.'

To get money flowing - money is a sign that you're on the right path.

1) Recognise you are an empath, stop feeling guilty
2) Get clarity around life purpose (who am I? whats my life purpose?)
3) Open channels - you're worthy and deserving to be rewarded for following your purpose. Love all of yourself. Abundance can be had simply by receiving what has been given. Gratitude for what we have.
4) Be aware of your gift, you are a channel for money flow
5) Take focus of money and follow your purpose. Do things that make you feel joyful, learn to receive
6) Allow yourself to enjoy receiving the money - be grateful
7) Put money for your self-care, pleasure. Spend without guilt.
8) Love your business.

Empaths are best to be in positions of leadership. Share opinions, contribute from a place of love, pay attention to where you're putting your money. Make money a priority.

Resentment and depletion is not good. Have more alone time, You attract narcissists because they are the perfect match for empaths. Start saying No. Trying to avoid conflict leads to more conflict. Say No to unhealthy relationships. To be happy - feel acceptance and awareness, choose the better option when in a dilemma, be the observer, develop a gentle language to say no, learn to receive, journal, love yourself.

live fearlessly. Don't suppress your thoughts. We don't attract by our thoughts but by who we are. When you love and  value yourself you don't have to watch your thoughts. Be Who you are.

Anita makes a strong case for the super sensitive, the empaths and shows how by protecting themselves, empaths can make a huge change in the world. It's a nice and empowering read.                          

Monday, August 30, 2021

Launched 'Take Off' - A 10x Exercise

So I launched 'Take Off' - a 10x Workshop, from Shobha's Yellow Butterfly programs yesterday. It's based on the OKR principles and a group of us got together to experiment with it. The idea behind it is simple.

O stands for Objectives and KR stands for Key results. It's a concept used by Google and many other organisations and written about by John Doerr in his book 'Measure What Matters'. The idea however is something all of us have experienced - that big goals get better performance than small goals. Or rather, when faced with a big situation we cannot get out of, we somehow find the resources to accomplish it.

Which means, setting ourselves big goals is better than setting small goals because we use the same amount of resources at our disposal better.

1) Objectives therefore are the 10x version of whatever you are doing, the big goal, the WHAT you'd like to achieve that gives you the greatest leverage in a time frame. (3-6-12-24 months) It is concrete, inspirational, gets you in the gut and makes you feel its not achievable. It's so big you need to alter your current methods, take stock of all resources and use them. They are realistic yet significantly big.

To win the tournament (especially if you haven't won before)
To earn 50 lakh in one year (if you have been earning 5 lakh before)

2) Key Results are the HOW of achieving the objectives. Each objective has 3-4 KRs. They are specific, measurable (has to have a number), time bound, action oriented (but be clear it does not mention an activity but an outcome - as in wrote a book vs published a book), verifiable. Typically involves taking stock of available resources, seeking external help where needed to use existing resources to meet goal. 

Get team organised - pick the right team with correct balance by xx date.
Set goal (to win all matches), values (play fair but hard, team comes first, play for one another) by xx date
Plan (targets, roles), prepare ti win every match each match - (analyse, strategise, bring in routines that make team feel better prepared)

Some key insights on how it works

1) Same resources that we have are better utilised once bigger goals come into picture

2)  Forces you to change the way you are working and look for creative ways to achieve goal

3) Once objective is written, KR flow intuitively

We had an introductory session yesterday. Another session to set our OKRs and then we follow up once in a fortnight.

       

    

Friday, August 27, 2021

Vikrithi - Movie

 2019. Malayalam.

My love for Malayalam movies grows and this one is yet another gem. Based on a true story about a man lying down in a Kochi metro after a stressful time at home and mistaken to be drunk and trolled online affecting him, his family and social status. 

Fabulous performances by the actors Suraj Venjarammodu and Soubin Shahir. Watch.


  

Squared Love - Movie

 2021. Polish. I found it rather amateurish, with an almost second rate Telugu film sensibility. A teacher who has a double life as a top model - only to pay off her father's debt, meets a playboy, in both her roles, and after some issues, all ends well.

Don't watch.


 

Monday, August 23, 2021

Just Breathe - Joel Shared this Beautiful Poem

 Joel Wilson shared this poem with me the other day - said it was forwarded to him by a friend from HPS, R. I don't know who the poet is but I liked it.


Just breathe…..


my brain and

heart divorced


a decade ago


over who was

to blame about

how big of a mess

I have become


eventually,

they couldn't be 

in the same room

with each other 


now my head and heart 

share custody of me


I stay with my brain 

during the week


and my heart 

gets me on weekends


they never speak to one another

 

    - instead, they give me

the same note to pass

to each other every week 


and their notes they

send to one another always 

says the same thing:


"This is all your fault"


on Sundays

my heart complains

about how my 

head has let me down

in the past


and on Wednesday

my head lists all

of the times my 

heart has screwed

things up for me 

in the future


they blame each

other for the 

state of my life


there's been a lot

of yelling - and crying


so,


    lately, I've been

spending a lot of 

time with my gut


who serves as my

unofficial therapist


most nights, I sneak out of the

window in my ribcage


and slide down my spine

and collapse on my 

gut's plush leather chair

that's always open for me


~ and I just sit sit sit sit

until the sun comes up


last evening, 

my gut asked me

if I was having a hard

time being caught 

between my heart

and my head


I nodded


I said I didn't know

if I could live with 

either of them anymore


"my heart is always sad about

something that happened yesterday

while my head is always worried

about something that may happen tomorrow," 

I lamented


my gut squeezed my hand


"I just can't live with

my mistakes of the past

or my anxiety about the future,"

I sighed


my gut smiled and said:


"in that case, 

you should 

go stay with your 

lungs for a while,"


I was confused

  - the look on my face gave it away


"if you are exhausted about

your heart's obsession with

the fixed past and your mind's focus

on the uncertain future


your lungs are the perfect place for you


there is no yesterday in your lungs

there is no tomorrow there either


there is only now

there is only inhale

there is only exhale

there is only this moment


there is only breath


and in that breath

you can rest while your

heart and head work 

their relationship out."


this morning,

while my brain

was busy reading

tea leaves


and while my

heart was staring

at old photographs 


I packed a little

bag and walked

to the door of 

my lungs


before I could even knock

she opened the door

with a smile and as

a gust of air embraced me

she said


"what took you so long?"

Chaar - Movie

 2014. Bengali. Anthology of four short films based on stories written by three writers - Bateswarer Abodan by Parasuram, Porikkha by Sharadidndhu Bandyopadhyay, Kagtarua and Dui Bondhu by Satyajit Ray. It's directed by Sandip Ray.

Bateswar is a famous writer and his serial has caught the fancy of the masses - but strangely many different individuals come to him to get him to change the tragic ending of a lead part. In Porikkha, a young lady tests her future husband's character by paying him a late night visit. In one story two childhood friends make a promise to meet after 25 years at a given place and time - and find one another in unexpected circumstances. And in the last one, a ghost comes to redeem itself from a crime its been accused of.

Interesting.


 

Home - Movie

 2021. Malayalam. Another brilliant Malayalam movie. Loved it. The dynamics at home, the little dramas, the set up and the pay off, ah, beautiful. 

Watch, watch.



eCanteen Fundas - How a Common Purpose Unites Teams

 First step in team building - get a common purpose!

https://www.edexlive.com/opinion/2021/aug/21/e-canteen-fundasdetermine-your-teams-purpose-to-watch-it-win-23431.html

E-Canteen Fundas: Determine your team’s purpose to watch it win



Pic: Edex Live


Our basketball team can do so much better,’ said Rahul. ‘But we’re not able to play to our potential.’

‘Happens everywhere,’ said Rinku. ‘We’ve got great individual players but fail as a team. Wonder why.’

‘That’s because we behave like a group of individuals, not like a team,’ said Rakesh. ‘Be it with family, friends, college or society, it’s the same. Real teams work together to achieve a common purpose that helps the team and the individuals grow. Real teams achieve much more than the sum of their parts. And as the team achieves its potential, individuals perform to their potential as well.’

‘How can I get our team going in the next game?’ asked Rahul.

‘Just like you get an army marching forward in sync,’ smiled Rakesh. ‘Get them to work for a common purpose. An army’s purpose is to win the war. Your basketball team’s purpose is to win the tournament. An organisation’s or a relationship’s purpose is to grow to its fullest potential. When our team knows and works towards the common purpose, we achieve miracles.’

‘How do we set a common purpose?’ asked Rinku.

‘In any team, a good purpose to start with is to help the team grow to its fullest potential,’ said Rakesh. ‘Within that, you can set more specific purposes. Ideally, the leaders spell out the team’s common purpose with the team’s involvement. But if not, any member, even you, can articulate it, as someone who’s interested in the team’s growth.’

‘That’s it, bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul.

‘That’s only half the job,’ said Rakesh. ‘The important part is getting every single member of the team to know and state the common purpose of the team. Can your team members state the common purpose of your team if you ask them now?’

‘No, bhaiyya,’ said Rahul.

‘Happens with most teams,’ said Rakesh. ‘Most of us assume that the others know the team’s purpose, which is why we end up moving in different directions and towards different goals. So Rahul, start your team-building exercise by making sure your team’s common purpose is clearly articulated and understood and everyone’s saying the same thing — we’re playing to win
the tournament. It focuses all your energy, all your effort.’

‘And make everything else subservient to the team’s purpose,’ said Rinku, ‘As working for the team’s common purpose helps individual members achieve their potential too. It’s a win-win.’

‘Thanks, bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘I’ll set a common purpose for all my teams — family, friends and college — and make them more purposeful and growth-oriented.’


Pro Tip: To get the best out of all your teams and relationships, set a common purpose of growth and watch how it helps you, your team and your relationships grow


Get Out of Your Own Way - Mark Goulston and Philip Goldberg

There are 40 ways in which you can get out of your way that are written in this book. I felt they could have been presented before to make one point more deeply tan skim through many - especially when the authors give many takeaways and to dos at the end of each chapter. Also instead of saying this is the problem, I would like some insights on how much and when to get worried.





But here's a list and we can check off if we're doing OK or not. (on a scale of 10)

1. Chasing after love and approval from a parent (3)

2. Getting involved with the wrong people (4)

3. Procrastinating (4)

4. Expecting others to understand how you feel (8)

5. Waiting until its too late (5)

6. Getting so angry you make things worse (4)

7. Saying yes when you want to say No (7)

8. Holding a grudge (4)

9. Assuming they don't want anything in return (5)

10. Always having to be right' (5)

11. Focusing on what your partner is doing wrong (5)

12. Putting up with broken promises (5)

13. Trying to make up while you're still angry (4)

14. Not learning from your mistakes (4)

15. Trying to change others (3)

16. Rebelling just for the sake of rebelling (4)

17. Talking when nobody's listening (3)

18. Pretending you're fine when you're not (6)

19. Becoming obsessive or compulsive (4)

20. Taking things too personally (6)

21. Acting too needy (5)

22. Having unrealistic expectations (5)

23. Trying to take care of everybody (7)

24. Refusing to play games (8)

25. Putting on an act to make a good impression (5)

26. Being envious of others (4)

27. Feeling sorry for yourself (6)

28. Assuming the hard way is the right way (7)

29. Thinking I'm sorry is enough (5)

30. Holding it all in (7)

31. Quitting too soon (5)

32. Letting Others Control your life (5)

33. Leaving too much to chance (6)

34. Letting fear run your life (5)

35. Not moving on after a loss (5)

36. Not getting out when the getting is good (5)

37. Not asking for what you need (7)

38. Giving advice when they want something else (5)

39. Backing down because you don't feel ready (5)

40. Playing it safe (5)

I guess it would have been totally different if I rated myself on this years ago. Now I have 9 items on a scale greater than 5 which is what I must work on. I feel a couple of years ago that number would have been double. So its been a growing experience and most of the 5s would have gone the other way. Things to work on for me are

- Not asking for what I need

- leaving too much to chance

- holding it all in

- assuming the hard way is the right way

- feeling sorry for myself

- refusing to play games

- trying to take care of everybody

- taking things too personally

- expecting others to understand how i feel

- saying yes when I mean no

- pretending to be fine when I am not

More on this later. Interesting book. Thanks Shobhs.

Voices of the Youth - An Interview with Prarthana Nargundkar

So here's the third one this series - one I started with Anjali, Pooja and Prarthana. Just to provoke some thought. Prarthana knows her mind and commits to everything with a joie de vivre that's infectious. She's good at so many things that she can make a living off anyone thing she chooses - learning, teaching, writing, design, people skills, cooking, critiquing. Right now she is doing a bit of everything so i am waiting for her to settle down to what she finally decides.

Nicely done Prarthana. Here goes. 

Prarthana Nargundkar - Life on her terms
  

 Q. What are your dreams? What do you want to achieve?

It is indeed strange when one states the concept of dream as being something that is un-real and yet here we are contemplating upon how something un-real can be achieved and setting targets and strategies to achieve it. So as to answer the idea of having goals i would say that my goals are compartmented into financial, educational and travel (as of now in my late 20s'.) 

Financial- For the past few years my market value for my knowledge and efforts has been not as I expected. Hence I want to work upon getting a job that gives me financial stability where I do not settle with great work and less pay.

Educational- If one wants to survive in the indian institutions to bring about a genuine change in hands on training especially for languages you ought to be at that designation where you can implement the changes rather than just suggest and wait for them to be approved and hope for it to happen. So, with growth of knowledge; power is essential. After spending 12 years as a language educator, I feel ready for the plunge not to satisfy my bucket list of accomplishments but to come out of my comfort zone and explore a theory that belongs to my experiences and knowledge. 

Travel- One life, live it right! and what is better than discovering cultures, places and food??

I am not a loner. I always prefer to be in a pack. But, I now wish to discover parts of me in places across the globe. I am slowly gathering the courage to travel solo at least once in a year. 

Q. At full potential, what do you think you can do best?

Anything and everything. I take up a challenge only if I am confident I can attempt to pull it off. And once I commence a project- personal, professional or even culinary based I ensure I give my EVERYTHING. I believe one should always test their potential even when you feel you aren't made for something. Well you'll never know if you only keep actions as a thought.

I never give up even if I know I am going to fail. Failures are life's best lessons.

Q. What do you need to fulfill your potential?

Plan A and Plan B and little or sometimes tremendous self belief.

I strongly feel you should always know where your effort is headed towards. Without a destination heading on a journey is pointless. You may be lost, you may take a different path, you may stumble upon unexpected obstacles; but you'll know where you are headed and alter the way you complete this journey.

Q. What are the barriers to fulfilling your dream?

lack of time. I am an overachiever and this is my major drawback. Sometimes 24 hrs are just not enough for me. 

Q. Would you feel that you are deviating from your academic training?

No. I staunchly believe I am in a very satisfying space in this aspect as there is constantly give & take in this process. I am learning constantly, almost every other day.

Q. Your thoughts now  - On the education system

Kinesthetic Learning should be encouraged as a part of academics. By this, I mean a huge audience of parents and educators needs to comprehend that learners should be encouraged to excel through experiences of the concepts and theories rather than focusing on being simply familiar with concepts and theories. Our education system is so focused on ensuring there are a series of systematic courses and degrees but not on the outcome produced by the learners when they are on the field. Are we really applying the concepts learnt? More importantly, are they relevant?

Hopefully NEP 2020 should change that, if the implementation of it fulfills as promised and on time.

Q. If you were the education minister what would you do?

1. Introduce Vocational Education in all the schools.

2. Improve the educational standard of public schools so that parents have a choice of cutting down on unnecessary expenditure in private schools.

3. Definitely improve the quality of educators. However absurd this may seem, it is vital to know one's vision towards being a part of the education system and not merely having a degree to be a part of one. There is a reason teacher-training has become a priority in many schools and colleges as a course and workshops. 

4. Employment- Post 58, people must retire so that the youth gets a chance to engage, be employed and be a part of the system.


Q. On the opportunities available to the youth

The world is yours, Never Settle.

With rapid increase in technology, courses and productivity one must not restrict themselves from exploring their skills and professional assets. We are where generations of people have left us a legacy of opportunities and ground work.


Q. On today's youth

Complicated, Materialistic and Never Satisfied. 

I can put this thought in a refined concept of the proverb; the grass is always greener on the other side. And once you are on the other side either you look for another grass or prefer the previous side of the greener grass.

Q. Why are the youth easily influenced?

Because they are uncertain and unaware of following their intuitions. We don't know what they are because we are constantly told 'what to do'. 'what is the best for us', 'what others are doing' or 'why this isn't good for us.'

It's like we are in an extended tuition of the subject, life. It is never ending. We are worried that if we make a choice and fail, we will have a handful of people waiting to state, "I told you not to take that road."

Take that road, fail, fall and rise. It is THE most important lesson to survival. One need not do what others did or are doing. Make your own legacy.

Q. If you had to change something what would you want to change in the youth?

The need to do insane things in peer pressure. 

Q. Your view on politics?

NIL

Q: Your view on society around you?

For the next ten years we are going to be stuck with an audience of three generations who know the right, who are imposing the right and who don't know what is right!


Q. Your views on religion?

NONE. I am a spiritual soul.

Q. Your views on love?

Oh, I was wondering when this question would pop up!

After many years of trying to find a strategic definition for it, all I can say is stop searching for it in your parents, pets, partners, nature or wherever you are looking for it. It is all within you. Face your angel and demons and proclaim self love. Nothing is more relevant, magical and rational than finding happiness in one self. 

And with all the others mentioned above, give love without expectations. 


Q. Your role models?

None as of now.

Q. What are the 3 things to change in society?

None. A society is made up of a zillion minds not working towards one direction and constantly having changeable and irreparable views.

I don't wish to change or be a part of these. It's a lot of work!

Q. Your favorite books?

A palace of illusions by Chitra Divakaruni Banerjee, The entire Harry Potter Series (I can read them over and over at any age) and Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coleho


Q. Your favorite movies?

Before Sunrise, Barfi, Yeh Jawani Hai Deewani, Kal ho na ho, Shutter Island and The Illusionist

Q. Favorite places?
Crossword, Rajasthan and anywhere in the mountains.

Q. The single most impactful moment.

The last day of a batch, every year.

Q. Your favorite music?

Not very choosy. I am open to any soulful music. 

Lately, I have taken an interest to sufi music.


Q. What was the most courageous things you ever did?

If a thought counts, I have been thinking of owning a dog.

For those who know me, I am very scared of dogs.

Q. Your philosophy?

We are all placed in this world, in the lives of people for a purpose even if it means only for a certain duration.

Look beyond the normal progress you make everyday and find your greater good with every experience.

 
Q. Your most romantic moments?

Yet to come.


Q. What does success mean for you?

It means I have to aim for something more out of my comfort zone.


Q. What is your relationship with money?

That I am never hungry for more. I am content with what I have and that I can eat biryani 7 days a week.


Q. What are your great discomforts?

Expectations and insecurities.