It's an Ad mad World - Old Idea, New Idea

This one irritates the heck out of me. First this guy asks the elderly guy if he can use his phone, then turns him down because he finds his phone rather old, and then becomes completely offensive to the extent of even feigning to hit him at the end. What's with you mate? It tops the list of irritating ads these days for me for its sheer offensive content, and the pandering to the 'youth' segment even if it means you behave like a lout with someone old enough to be your Dad. Come on guys, you can do better than that.

So the story goes of a miserly son of a gun who is generally filching calls off other people's phones. He asks an elderly gentleman if he can use his phone. But it appears that our ero does not want to use the phone to make calls and receive calls which is pretty 'old'. He'd rather fly to Mars on it you see. And he makes all sorts of faces at the old man's phone before flashing his own phone. Now if you had one already, why do you need another guy's phone? Then he shows the old man some sneak peeks on his new phone and gets back at him with some classic lines and cheap stunts. Not funny at all. Even if someone said that the old man was offensive when he says 'main paise nahin loonga' - I'd say this guy deserved it for the faces he makes when he sees the phone. To push his phone under the old man's face and repeat 'main paise nahin loonga' is not funny.

This idea that the youth is all wonderfully connected, tech savvy and rude to old people is all fine. What we don't need is middle aged actors going about behaving like college kids in an effort to make the youth think its too goddam cool. To me this ad goes to the bottom of the pile for its totally unctuous and offensive tone.

It's an Ad, Mad World - The Ball Bouncing Buyers and Sellers

Quickr has this slightly unbelievable ad where people are bouncing balls or throwing them over their shoulder and by the time the balls get back to them, they have completed their transactions. The ads do get the story of speed across, gets the brand name reinforced in the viewer's mind which is two out of three for it. As for the idea of bouncing and throwing balls I am not too convinced but it seems to get the major story in so I'd have no problem with it if I was Quickr.

The Story as I See It - Buy and Sell Those Who Do Not Want to Think
We have a competition of sorts for people who are in a hurry to buy or sell things online. The entire idea seems to be to sell or buy before the balls bounce back for reasons best known to them. Presumably they are really keen to get rid of the stuff or buy that stuff or whatever. The focus does not seem to be on the value one gets - just of getting rid of stuff or getting stuff quickly without spending any thought. For those who want to buy and sell without giving any thought to the process, this is the perfect site.

Conclusion
Apart from the bouncing ball business which probably serves to assist brand recall, I don't have too much of a problem with this ad. Qucikr actually registers better than the other site which goes like OWL or OMG or something - a site that seems to have better ads but lower brand recall. If only they had worked someway of getting the speed and brand in without compromising too much on the value angle of the buying and selling.

It's an Ad, Mad World - The Super Man with Wings

The Volkswagon Jetta ad caught my ad instantly. To me one of the better ads of the season in many ways - says just enough, gets the message across and most importantly has enough to make you remember which brand it is all about. It is uniquely made, catches the eye and makes you think.

The Story as I saw it
Here's the young little lad who has wings but who realises that these wings are not something that make him different in a bad way, but something that makes him different in a super human way. He is flying, kicking in goals, saving people and enjoying the stardom of the man with the wings until her sees the Jetta - and decides to trade the wings in for the car. The look on his face as he drives off, looking at the place his wings had been is fantastic.

I have no complaints with this ad. Completely thinks differently, gets your attention with some weird visuals, a different looking model and tells a story in a fashion that makes you wonder why this superman is driving away in this car. Full marks to the creative team for coming up with this ad. Tops the list of ads this season for me.

It's an Ad Mad World - Reliance Net Connect

An ad that stands out above the rest these days is the one about Reliance Net Connect. The ads are based purely on grabbing your attention by putting the models in life and death situations with little time and only a Reliance Net Connect to help them. One is about a guy who is tied up in a car and a train is approaching, another about a girl who is in a car that catches fire and there is one more that I cannot remember.

The story
So there are people who get into this situation willingly, I presume its a reality show, and waiting to be killed. The first guy is tied up with some complex knot and a train is approaching. He somehow gets the laptop started (how did he get it started so quickly?) puts the Reliance Net Connect and is connected. Now this is where my problem starts. How does he know which knot is on his hand? Even if he did, I'd like to put the guy who made this ad in that situation and see how he gets out so quick.

Similarly the girl who is driving her car finds that the boot of the car has blown up. Her only option is the laptop and Reliance Net Connect. She quickly logs on even as she is driving and finds out where the nearest fire station is. The firemen put out the fire. But how about something simple like getting out of the car? What if there was traffic on the way? What if the car just blew up as she was driving? And what if the firemen were away at lunch?

The Verdict
The ads do convey the super speed of Reliance Net Connect. That much gets conveyed pretty clearly. I'd think I'd have no problem with the ads if I was Reliance since I'd have established that one USP well. I don't mind pushing the envelope here for the sake of getting the message across. However, if I were in a situation similar to that, I'd do certain things a little differently. Like opening the door to my car and getting out when it catches fire. My laptop takes an hour to even get started.

It's an Ad Mad World - Sanju, Sanju

Anyone who has seen the advertisement of a hysterical wife looking for her husband, screaming 'Sanju, Sanju' loudly and rushing into their home will know what this ad is all about. It is about the uncertainty of life - like finding your husband alive. And when there is uncertainty in life, you are expected to take life insurance!

The Story of the Killer Wife
Any number of times I watch it, this ad never fails to make me wonder if the wife (I am assuming it is the wife) is actually expecting him to be dead. Is she the killer? Her whole demeanour is that of a wife who wants her husband dead at the earliest. I mean, here is a guy who is really chilled out on a working day, reading a magazine, sleeping off happily without a care in the world. He is one of those who will live happily for a hundred years. But add the stress that this screeching, stressed out banshee piles on him needlessly, and then you have a different story. Also when she finds him alive she reacts with complete surprise - how did he survive? Survive what? The nap? I know wives could be dangerous to health, but this one is a sure killer. That guy Sanju (I hope he is Sanju) has no chance is she keeps up like this - she does not need a knife. Even I get stressed out watching the ad (and have also taken life insurance from Max!)

It is a sad tale really and touches the heart, ouch, let me rephrase it, touches you. A wife who loves her husband so much that she constantly expects to find him dead, a lazy husband who is shirking work and sleeping off at home and the only obvious solution - life insurance!

But seriously, the ad has strong recall value. A bit too dramatic. The ad has made a return after a while (is it the season for heart attacks!). But overall I generally liked the Max ads, right from the ones with Rahul Dravid and his fans who gave him tons of wonderful advise. This one does not compare with those for me, but it probably has a different agenda. I am always a bit confused with this ad though - is he unhealthy, is he expected to have a heart attack, is she always like this? Is it cheaper to get a divorce than buy life insurance in such cases?

It's an ad, mad world - Godrej Power Play

I have no idea what this is about. I really tried. All I can make out is a bunch of people flying about in some futuristic shopping mall throwing balls. For good measure there are some cricketers as well who are whacking the leather off the ball and they all end up feeling pretty good at the end of it all.

Its too bizarre for me to make up a story. Every single character is disjointed and the only thing they are doing that is discernible is catch and throw a ball while flying off or landing in what seems to be a gravity defying shopping mall. Thanks Godrej for the entertainment but what was it about please!

It's an ad, mad world - Nokia, tension mat le yaar

The new Nokia 'tension mat le yaar' or something to that effect definitely causes me tension. What's the purpose of the ad? Somebody please help me.

The ventriloquist and bemused sportsmen

So there is a team of cricketers who are apparently not doing too well because the owner of the team is giving them some valuable tips on how to go about what they know best. Now to help them out he has hired an excellent bunch of experts from all over the place - an old lady who makes good lassi, a champi tel maalish chap and so on. These chaps give out their advise to the cricketers and the owner becomes the medium as he gives them a tel maalish and lassi and what not. Now this owner has some powers of ventriloquism which he uses and amuses the bemused cricketers. How much this new method works we do not know because the team is still hanging out there at the bottom someplace. Maybe its time the team owner got some better advise.

And its probably time for Nokia also to come up with something better than just have SRK and the team of cricketers and a line that says tension mat le yaar or something like that. Did no good to anyone - Nokia, SRK, the cricketers or the KKR team if you ask me. Trashy campaign for Nokia. As for KKR, they better take more pride and be a little less self-deprecating - even if its for ads.

It's an ad, mad world - Airtel 3G

The Airtel 3G story is a story that represents reality I guess. Blissfully ignorant parents happy in the front seats of their new car and crooked blackmailing son happy in the back seat with his new acquisition. The kid in the back does a great job - and gets on your nerves for his real Prem Chopra like deception.

Airtel 3G - A tale of how future villains are made
The Airtel 3G family is something we all know. Father is busy earning money and going to gym, mother is busy with her little parties and son is busy browsing the net 24/7 for useful information. Anyway the family wants to go for a wedding in Bangkok - the son in the backseat is not willing. Until he uses his superfast 3g connection - to find out all the things to do in Bangkok's nightlife on the web - before his parents reach the next signal. The kid looks no older than 14 but his exceptionally fast browsing skills for women and Bangkok, aided by some super fast 3g service by Airtel causes him to change his mind. With a leer that would have done Prem Chopra proud, the kid tells his authoritarian Dad that he will go, but only for him. Dad and Mom are pleased that they can all go to Bangkok now. Looking at that family one wonders if all of them are going for similar reasons. Anyway, they have Airtel 3g and they can all browse and check out what they want to do in Bangkok separately because it looks quite dysfunctional as it is. But for one lasting effect the kid in the back seat gives one look at his Dad that would have done Damine of 'The Omen' fame proud! A look that says **** you Dad!


Docomo - Sad story of a stand up comedian
This is the sad story of a stand up comedian who has recently found out the meaning of family planning. He also has a mildly appreciative audience. There are many features that this stand up comedian is supposed to convey funnily about family planning through mobile services in a simple way. Unfortunately the ads are too complicated for me to understand why they are simple. The unshaven comedian is going on and on about family planning, about customer care executives who come on instantly, about Niharika who got into somebody's family plan thanks to some bad family planning, about lions that eat zebras instead of Chinese, South Indian etc, about this grown up guys father who still pays his phone bills and his credit card bills - nothing much else. How has it simplified anyone's life by eating zebras I do not know but that's how this ad works. Maybe this family planning mobile service (now don't ask me how they manage that) just has one scheme, one plan which would mean that they can do with one customer care executive as well. Anyway, more when I figure out what is happening to that guy and his family planning.

I thought Airtel could have shown something a bit more sensible than a kid browsing for nightlife in Bangkok. Come on guys, where is your creativity? And one does not need to do everything to pamper certain segments like the youth by trying to project this as cool. I look to ads to give me the picture perfect life - not for the crap that we know goes on underneath anyway. So maybe you could do a campaign that has the same theme, same people and a better story that makes your heart go full and want to buy Airtel 3g. Not want to throw it away!
And the Docomo ads, though the concept is good and innovative, the messages need to be crisper and more focussed. Certainly more funnier. What's a stand up comedian doing with such lame lines. More creativity again. Like I said, I still have not figured out one single feature that makes life better except for the customer care ad. Some of the others make no sense to me!

It's an ad, mad world - Brrr

I find this ad by Coke and the next one by Pepsi very irritating. I am sure many have. I cannot believe that the ad agencies actually made money on this by selling them to Coke and Pepsi and telling them that the entire nation would now be going around making Brrrr sounds and dancing and drinking Coca Cola and Pepsi. I also sympathise a bit with the cricketers because they are inane and idiotic.

The Brrr Conspiracy
So then this is the story of a bunch of cricketers are in great danger. They believe that by uncorking Coke bottles and looking for the highly intelligent Brrrr sign so they can get the coke free. Most are so enthused with this form of entertainment that they are all going Brrrr like there is no tomorrow. Now here is the twist in the story. Why would people go Brr when they drink a soft drink? Is there some new foreign element in it? Does it cause some mental disturbance? Or some physical disturbance? I have never seen anyone go Brrr like this as if there was an alien inside them (actually I saw something like this in the movie Alien many years ago). It is time for some serious research by the food and beverage guys. The poor guys need some medical help. And we cannot afford to lose our valuable cricketers this way.

The Indian Te am and the Blackmailer
In the other ad three healthy and robust cricketers are being blackmailed by one scrawny kid who is barely out of his teens and does not even have a moustache. The kid takes away the hardworking cricketers' Pepsi like a villain in a movie and when they ask for it tells them to do a jhatkaj, matak and ghatak. There were times like when Gabbar requests Basanti to dance that villains have made hapless heroines dance like this but this is new. Having men, and that too fully grown up men dance for a coke bottle by a young kid who repeatedly teases them was certainly rather upsetting for me because we thought these guys were heroes. Once again our Indian team ka izzat is at stake and I suggest that someone file a compliant with the police and arrest that blackmailing kid before our cricketers loosen a hip joint or die of thirst or something. Once again our team which has just won the World Cup is in danger and I request the authorities to intervene.

Both ads, obviously focused at our youth do not say much in terms of their intelligence or maturity. I find it difficult to believe that all things irreverent are youthful or appeal to the youth. Fun is good, a sense of mischief is fine but this did not impress me at all. More creativity needed guys to make it really top class and appealing. Nothing in the ad makes me want to buy it that's for sure.

It's an ad, mad world - Meethe mein kuch ho jaye

I liked the idea that Cadbury had to reposition the chocolate bar as mithai, and that too post-meal mithai, by breaking it into small mithai shaped squares. Its a nice new use to the chocolate bar which was earlier used only as a premium event mithai - for girlfriends, on special occasions, for special people - now we can have it post meal and everyone can have their bar as well. As an idea to reposition the chocolate it is fantastic.

Anyway the Cadbury family is a bunch of people who are generally eating yesterday's stuff or the kind of stuff no one wants to eat. Which is healthy stuff and the kind of stuff that real kanjoos families make like yesterday's bhaji. Now this family is generally put off by the menu or perhaps the culinary skills of the amma of the house and is generally rushing out of the house to get a decent meal. There is one guy who looks like he is one of the earning members of the house and he asks his wife (I am presuming) what there is for dinner and she playfully sprays him with some water and informs him that there is karela for dinner. At which the youngster loses his enthusiasm for life but still persists and asks her what they have for meetha and she laughs coquettishly. Now at that stage of the campaign I was wondering what a karela eating family was doing stocking chocolates - I mean health or unhealth, cheap or expensive - they have to be true to one thing. And the way the daughter in law sashays and play with her husband it almost resembled a luxury condom ad. But then in subsequent ads it is revealed that the whole idea is that this family has only karela, lauki and such stuff to eat, the mother is the culprit, there is an ugly sister, a slightly frustrated wife- your regualr dysfunctional family. Anyway they are all happy with an everlasting stock of chocolate at home which they eat after every karela or lauki meal.

Brand sticks in the head, the repositioning idea is good. Only issue is that the stories could be sharper and more focused instead of going off into sub stories making the viewers wonder if its about chocolate or contraceptives. Or they could go another step and say meethe ke baad kya hai and actually sell contraceptives as well.

It's an ad, mad world - Zoo Zoos

For sheer brand recall, clarity of message, creativity and an assured smile, the Zoo Zoos take it all away. Vodafone's campaign is brilliant and the execution even more so. The superman of Vodafone unfortunately beats the superman of Idea in this respect at least and is so much more loveable. Whether he is doing a Rajnikanth by splitting his bowling ball into two and finishing off his game in style, delivering mail to people all over the world at super fast speed, flying off casually to meet his other super friends on another planet or whatever other things that he does, the Zoo Zoo is immensely watchable and loveable.

There will be no stories on good ads. So what do I take away. That the Zoo Zoos represent Vodafone is clear. That the superman is doing something related to mobile services is even more clear. That the superman is really super duper is even more clear because we can see him doing it - not telling it. The best thing about the Zoo Zoos is that they say it like it is, keep the message clear and simple and do not confuse the issue. My vote for this brilliant campaign any day!

It's an ad, mad world - 3G

I am completely flummoxed by most of the ads these days. Very few make sense to me. The ones that do appear to choose a complex route to do it. After all the trouble they have taken to make the ad and make the star and super stars dance to their tunes - if they cannot even leave me with the name of the brand then there is a problem somewhere. Anyway I choose to make my own stories based on the ads I have seen. My first story is of Idea 3G which I have been bombarded with for a while now.

This is the story of three identical looking middle aged men. Their names I presume are 1g, 2g and 3 g. 1g is the slightly challenged chap, 2g is somewhere in between doing nothing and 3g is the superhero. Something like Rainman, only with 3 people and the superhero is the other guy not 1g. Now it appears that 1g and 2g are closer to one another and they are often caught in situations. Once they are in hospital with their legs broken and kept in cast but they want to play football (most likely their legs have been broken while playing football and knowing the kind of footwork these gentlemen have, we can understand). 1g and 2g are wondering how when 3g comes up and offers them a mobile game and they are all happy. Another time 1g and 2g are at a bus stop waiting for a bus to watch an IPL match and are sad that no bus is coming when 3g comes and shows them the match on his mobile. 1g and 2g give up the match. Another time they are talking to somebody's wife on the phone and are glad that they have her in their control. 3g appears to be saying that he can do everything better, though remotely, for some reason. 1g and 2g have no clue about anything anyway. They are the ones who have no idea while 3g is the one who has the idea. Hopefully the three brothers stay together happily ever after and one hopes that maybe just having 3g might serve the purpose better. 1g and 2g can be sent to their respective institutions.

One way or the other this ad got the message across thanks to the brand association of Abhishek Bachchan with idea. But I think they got it right only when they got to the 'get an idea' campaign (though one wonders if the network is really that good). In the 3g ads, the penny properly dropped only in the 'loading, loading' ad which directly addressed the issue of speed and did not confuse the issue with cricket matches, wives and football.