Canteen Fundas - Why Managing Emotions is the Key to a Successful and Happy Life

Emotional Intelligence - There's much we don't know about it!

https://www.edexlive.com/opinion/2020/aug/16/canteen-fundas-why-managing-your-emotions-is-the-key-to-a-successful-and-happy-life-13895.htmlCanteen Fundas: Why managing your emotions is the key to a successful and happy life

Managing Your Emotions is the Key to a Happy, Successful Life

‘Bhaiyya, Rinku’s very upset today,’ said Rahul. ‘She yelled at everyone. Including me.’

‘Wow,’ said Rakesh. ‘What triggered it Rinku?’

‘Don’t know bhaiyya,’ said Rinku. ‘Just lost it.’

‘It helps to identify your emotions and feelings to deal with them better,’ said Rakesh. ‘Let’s check. How’re you both feeling now?’

‘Bad,’ said Rinku.

 ‘Good,’ said Rahul.

‘You need to do better than feeling ‘good’ or ‘bad’ if you want to develop your emotional intelligence,’ smiled Rakesh.

‘What’s this emotional intelligence bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul.

‘Emotional Intelligence is your ability to identify, express and manage emotions,’ said Rakesh. ‘It helps you to manage yourself and your relationships effectively instead of getting hijacked by your emotions. Emotionally intelligent people are aware, adaptable, positive, empathetic and achievement oriented.’

‘Wow, how do we develop our emotional intelligence bhaiyya?’ asked Rinku.

‘First understand what emotions and feelings are about,’ said Rakesh. ‘Emotions are non-conscious, physical reactions such as sweating, irregular breathing, increased pulse rate etc triggered by external stimulus. Feelings, on the other hand, are conscious, mental experiences triggered by emotions attached to your memories and thoughts. For example, if you’re late for an appointment, you feel tightness in your stomach, leading to a conscious feeling of sadness or guilt triggered by a thought.’

‘I didn’t know that,’ said Rinku.

‘Since we aren’t encouraged to feel our emotions and feelings, we don’t even know them, much less deal with them,’ said Rakesh. ‘Take basic emotions like joy, sadness, fear or anger. Joy in turn can be peaceful, loving, optimistic, intimate; and sadness could be hurt, embarrassed, lonely, depressed etc. Check out the ‘Feelings Wheel’ on the net and you’ll find hundreds of emotions related to these core emotions. Identifying your emotions is the first step towards improving your emotional intelligence.’

‘But why manage emotions bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul.

‘Because if you don’t, your emotions control you,’ said Rakesh. ‘They hijack your reactions and can mess up your relationships, your decision-making, your behavior, energy and health. But remember, all emotions are our friends and serve a purpose, as shown so beautifully in the movie ‘Inside Out’. It’s never the emotion, but our reaction to it that’s the problem.’

‘How can we manage our emotions bhaiyya,’ asked Rahul.

‘Next time you’re upset, identify and ‘feel’ your emotion,’ said Rakesh. ‘Feel the sensation in your body fully without suppressing it. By acknowledging, identifying and accepting your emotion, you’ve responded consciously. You’ve broken the unconscious reaction and managed your emotion. Managing difficult emotions frees up energy and helps you achieve challenging personal and team goals efficiently. That’s why emotional intelligence is considered a key competency in successful people.’

‘Wow,’ said Rinku. ‘I’ll work on improving my emotional intelligence right away bhaiyya. I feel so relieved.’

‘I’m feeling excited too,’ said Rahul. ‘It’s chai time.’

Pro Tip: Improving your emotional intelligence helps you manage your personal and social life effectively, leading to healthy relationships, higher productivity and better quality of life.