I realised recently that there is a danger in taking everything so seriously. At times when we are involved in doing something well we take it too seriously and get too tight and uppity about it. In games people get very serious and tight and that affects their game. I remember how Sachin Tendulkar once spoke about how he would concentrate so hard on the ball 100% of the time that he would get drained out. Then he figured how to switch on and off. Focus hard only when the ball is delivered and it comes to you, and then relax. Don't have to focus all the time.
This is what I realised yesterday.
There are things that I like to own and do in a certain way - be it my work, or how I am with people, or how I do things. I aim to do it right, to add value, to make it better. But then its a lot of pressure and it has negative effects. People don't like serious, school master like people around them telling them what is right and what is wrong. In the middle of a conversation where I was feeling a lot of stress I could see this dial in my head - 'due, you are at a 9 in terms of your involvement here' dial it down to 2.' And that's it. Once I recalibrated my approach to that conversation, I found it was quite easy to be able to laugh about it and not get too serious about it.
That's it. Just recalibrate.
I do the same thing with my work. I take it very seriously and that perhaps affects the rest of my team as well. Yes, I need to take it seriously but not all the time. I can hold it easy and crank up seriousness when I need to. I know that my style is to get fully involved and perhaps it needs practice to make this change, but I will get there.
Right now the recalibration dial is a great tool. I am fine with being at 2. I do not need to hold the world up. I can do it when I need to.
What a relief to live at 2. So the next time you are in an intense place, recalibrate, let go and shrug the burden off.
Chill. Laugh.
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