Thought for the Day - The Child, Adult and the Parent

 Every once in a while we slip into these roles - adult, parent, child. As adults we behave more childishly than any child i.e. we put up walls, talk rationally, keep emotions under control, be more transactional, watch out for oneself first and not make mistakes that can come back and bite you. As a result we do get a wary version of an insecure person who is trying to be safe and perhaps 'smart' (as in taking all the benefits minus the responsibility or the work!).

When we do behave like children (or like the child) we are perhaps behaving more spontaneously and being more vulnerable than the more sanitised version of being an adult. When we behave like a child however we do put ourselves out there without being 'smart', without thinking of the pros and cons, of benefits etc. It is a version where the child can ask for the moon, for irrational things. Once again without responsibility, without any work, and perhaps no thinking about benefits. Just an 'I want..'

The parent is stuck with being responsible and unfortunately also has to put in the work of placating the child. One cannot do this as an adult because there is no benefit involved in this transaction. Its a losing transaction actually and can only be done for love - like a parent. So any adult looking for an adult relationship will quickly tire of the 'child' because they do not want to 'take care'. 

In such scenarios any relationship where the child pops up in an adult, can put the other adults under strain, especially if the child in the adult does not know the line. The line can easily be crossed if the adult-child behaves like an irritating juvenile who only wants more and more - without any responsibility. This would in all likelihood make other adults quickly get bored and tired because no one wants a cry baby under the guise of being spontaneous or child like.

The solution to this - find a leadership position and figure where you want to be - adult, child, parent. What do you want? Take responsibility for it. Find the line. If you're unsure, stay within the line. A boring adult is preferable to an irritating child!