Thought for the Day - Why We Are Different With Different People

This was a topic of discussion with a friend of mine. One perspective is that we must be totally ourselves whoever we are with and that is the best way to be. I find that position too idealistic and not practicable. My view is that we are totally different people with different people in our lives (check yourselves out with different circles of yours, they will never get along with one another). We are probably different to ourselves too. Not entirely honest I mean. Let me explain.

First let's deal with other people. I see no reason why we should impose all our wonderful parts on other people. Some people like my stupid jokes, some like my serious nature, some like my quiet brooding presence, some like my wise insights, some like...To those who like that part of me, I will engage only that part. I find no necessity to impose the other parts unless they expressly show an inclination to engage in that aspect. Some one wants to talk sweet nothings need not be given my world views on politics, cricket, films etc. I think its only fair to them. Even if I were to look at that selfishly, I see no reason to show all my other parts to a person if there is absolutely no match or vibe there. Why would I want to do that?

In my opinion we are consciously or unconsciously engaged in a game of survival, of manipulation, to get what we want. It could be anything - from love, to pity, to sympathy, to drama, to pain - we could be addicted to anything and we manipulate our relationships, keep or break them, twist or mould them to suit our end result. Naturally this does not include being totally open and naked - where one is open to being manipulated but has no leverage to manipulate. To avoid that state of utter defencelessness we show only certain layers to certain people depending on how much we think it will provoke the response we want. It also explains why we blow hot and blow cold and why we engage differently with different people and how we engage differently with the same people over a period of time. In a nutshell, its a survival tactic that keeps the dangerous ones outside the compound and the loving ones in the bedroom. To be naked is a highly evolved concept and needs much forgiveness, much love and also capacity to handle pain.

Now when I see the relation between me and myself, I feel that we still play the games with ourselves too. We can delude ourselves into thinking we are good, or bad. We can be what we want and believe it too, based on what we want the end result to be. We are not even honest with ourselves fully because it would place a burden on us to be true to that core. If we are dishonest, we can be different people according to the situation. To some I am kind, to some I am cruel, to some I am loving, To some I am aloof, to some I am endearing, to some I am honest and to some dishonest. I am all these parts certainly and that is the truth. We think one way and behave one way (and cause ourselves headaches), we surprise ourselves with certain thought processes and actions, we keep our secrets, because these other parts sneak out. There is certainly no need to go about showing all parts, neither the good nor the bad.

The only thing is to be, to survive and to see if what we are getting out of it all meets what we want. If we can handle it all without anyone else influencing us, that is the best state. It is the state when we don't give a damn about other people's opinion of us. We can be fully ourselves in such situations, in all situations. It is a fine state, a selfishness that carries no guilt. Stuff that we could ask the gods as a boon.

IPL 7 - An Analysis of Leadership Styles

As I did once before I'd like to analyse leadership styles of the captains of the teams in play. I have always felt that in India popular sentiment is given more weightage than leadership ability. That one blunder costs the entire team heavily. Look at how the various parties are promising posts to various communities and castes and not on ability. It's a shame. Look at our leaders and how they have got their positions. Rarely on merit or ability.

Anyway, back to cricket. Some teams might have fallen prey to the same kind of thinking and might have appointed captains based on nationality rather than ability. Shikhar Dhanwan is a case in point. Why would he lead a side when they have an international captain who has already won a T20 World Cup in the side is something I do not understand. Its not that Shikhar has led Delhi often or his zone often. Why then do they need to burden a good player with the task of proving himself as a captain and lead players of the calibre of Steyn. Warner, Sammy et al. is a question that the Sunrisers can ask themselves.His shaky confidence would reflect in why Mishra fallen off, why Steyn is coming apart, why their entire campaign is looking shaky.

The order then.
Exceptional class
1) Mahinder Singh Dhoni leads the pack for me as usual. Quietly efficient, he is retreating even further behind and letting his team perform. The perfect example of Lao Tzu's quote on leadership - that the people would finally say they did it themselves when it is done. They are sailing through CSK is and half the team has not even played.

2) Shane Watson gets the nod because he is getting his fringe players to perform. Tambe, Samson, Rahane, Binny, Karun Nair and the young Indian brigade which is nowhere near the national scene is doing it for him which is a great achievement. Watson also believes in leading from the front as he did with the bat in the super over and the ball in the match against KKR. Able replacement for Warne. Go Watson. Cricket Australia missed a trick when they mishandled Watson. I do believe he is great captaincy material.

Reliables
3) George Bailey is another quiet achiever. He is not an outstanding strategist nor motivator but he is solid and calm and supports his players which is great. Getting out of the way is half the job done. Why then would Maxwell find such outrageous form that he never was allowed to in Mumbai's heavyweight zone, Miller, Sehwag and others chipping in. Again for me the performance of the fringe players is the key.

4) Virat Kohli is one who can never be written off as a captain simply because he is so intense and wants to win all the time. His own form and that of Gayle's must be worrying for him but the fact that AB pulled them out of the hole in that sensational match against Sunrisers must have given the team the boost it needs. I'd never write of Virat Kohli's team. Now if only he could  balance that high intensity with a bit more calm and knowing guidance he would be in Dhoni's league.
 
Unsure
5) Dinesh Kartik / Kevin Pieterson: Kartik was hardly effective as a skipper and now with Pietersen in, one must wait and watch. The team still looks bits and pieces and certainly does not look confident or look together. Much work needed. They look tense and are not enjoying themselves.

Struggling

6) Rohit Sharma has the tough job of being responsible for the team's performance while listening to an eminent board of experts that starts with Sachin, Kumble, Ponting, Robin Singh, Wright and many more luminaries I cannot remember. It is ridiculous. The captain needs to make the calls and needs an uncluttered mind. What the hell are all these mentors and coaches and experts doing there I wonder. Even their presence adds to the pressure. Take a leaf out of RR's book boys. I am surprised they won last year bu to me MI will always be heavy with names and low on player and team performances.

7) Shikhar Dhawan should not have been made captain. Now that they painted themselves into a corner the management cannot undo it without more damage being done. Only Shikhar can do himself and his team a favor and save them by quitting the job and focusing on his job as a batsman. The poor boy was such a natural and uninhibited player who brought so much joy to the field and look what they have done to him. All serious and not enjoying himself at all. Go ahead and quit Shikhar, and put it down to learning. You have much time ahead of you anyway.

8) Gautam Gambhir needs to smile a bit more says Ganguly (who never smiled much himself). But he is right, Saurav Ganguly is. Gambhir's intensity and sense of perfection is his biggest strength and his biggest weakness. Any team that lost from yesterday's position (122 for no loss chasing 170 odd) can only mean one thing - too much pressure on it. Much of this pressure must be absorbed by the captain, something MSD does so well and something Gambhir, a vocal critic of MSD, must be realising now. Its a tough job again for him with another bunch of experts from Akram, Raman, Dahiya and several others pouring down advise. Take the pressure off yourself, off the team and go out and enjoy yourself (by giving your best). The pressure tactics obviously did not work. Use the other angle. Keep it simple chief and trust your players. They are here to do their best and they will do it if you don't scowl so much.

My advise for Gambhir would be to call his team, tells them he trusts them to do their best and leave it at that. Best thing for him to do is chill and have a chat with someone while in the dressing room instead of working himself and his team up. Trust them chief, and let them be. They will do it. It's a great side, balance wise and the only problem is this immense pressure they are playing under. KKR does not deserve to be there and much of where they are comes down to the skippers attitude.

That then is my take on the captains. I might refine my thoughts by the end yet.

The Blue Jasmine - Movie Review

Woody Allen springs a nice surprise. Cate Blanchett is Jasmine, a rich socialite who has travelled to San Francisco to stay with her sister until she finds her feet. Her husband has lost his money, got arrested and as we find out later, dead. What does rich and beautiful and classy Cate have to do with ordinary Ginger of working class tastes is this - they have both been adopted by their foster parents. Obviously both think differently. Cate always wants class, looks different,  talks and walks different. Ginger cannot but think beyond the working class. Cate is dreamy. Ginger, feet on ground.

It unravels that Cate's rich husband has not only cheated Ginger and ex-husband who had won a lottery but many others in his realty business. While Ginger's marriage breaks up thanks to their dreams going up in smoke. Jasmine's husband is finding ways to cheat the system and keep his ill gotten wealth. He is also cheating on his wife. Unhappy with his many liasons Cate gives him up and he gives himself up. Jasmine is alone and broke, and lands up with her sister.

What happens with the clash of cultures between the two sisters is interesting. Cate is delusional and dreamy even if it means deluding herself and others. Ginger believes her for a while and almost falls into the trap Jasmine is stuck in before she saves herself.

What is intriguing is the way Woody Allen goes into the minds of both women, their aspirations and their blocks. Ginger is saved by her mediocrity as she accepts all, and sees happiness in what she gets though it is not the best. Cate might find a way out for herself or she might die. The two sisters remind you of the developed nations and the undeveloped ones. Cate Blanchett is brilliant and deservedly won the Academy Award. The movie would not have held without her portrayal of Jasmine aka Jeanette. Having said that the casting is perfect.

The Great Indian Novel - Shashi Tharoor

Why Shashi Tharoor went into politics is something I do not know but he is one hell of a writer and he should have continued writing. I bought 'The Great Indian Novel' a few years ago and was daunted by the small print more than anything else and the size. However its time had come and rightly so at a time in my life when my knowledge of both the Mahabharatha and the Indian political system and history are slightly better than before. The novel mounts the Indian freedom struggle and its aftermath on the complex structure of Mahabharatha - a task that requires one to know both well and one to have a stout heart, knowledge and the flair to pull it off. And pull it off he does and in style.

The novel starts with the narrator VVji (aka Ved Vyas) recollecting the story and dictating it to Ganapathy who is supposed to record it all. His story starts at the turn of the 20th century with the story of Shantanu and Satyavati, both married once before. From Shantanu's marriage to Ganga is born Gangaji or Bhishm of the unshakeable vow and from Satyavati are born  Chitangada and Vichitravirya. Then VVji enters the scene and produces Dhritharashtra, Pandu and Vidur. The Mahabharatha starts rather linearly before the Indian freedom struggle comes on.

Then the characters from the freedom struggle and after come on to the pages. Gangaji is Gandhiji, Nehru is Dhritarashtra, Pandu is Bose, Vidur is Sardar Vallabh bhai Patel, Duryodhini is Indira Gandhi, Draupadi Mokrasi is Democracy. Mohammad Ali Jinnah is Karna, Yudhshtir is Morarji Desai, Bhim is the Indian army, Arjun the media, Nakul and Sahadev are the external affairs and the beurocracy, Jayaprakash Drona is Drona and so on and on. The characters and institutions flit through until it all ends as the Mahabharatha ends. Shashi Tharoor spares no one and is brilliant in the way he has cast people and institutions and in the way he shows us up for all our hypocricies and impotencies.

The story's premise and the scale is ambitious and Shashi Tharoor adopts the perfect tone for it, half jesting, never serious until almost the end when he tears into the system with such clarity that you wonder what happened to all that he had two decades ago. The writing style is smooth and the way he weaves the story deftly keeping the major plot points of both great stories in mind is brilliant. Satire at its best. Sadly few will understand this take on our history in our age of pulp fiction and fewer perhaps will learn from it. The great tragedy of this book is that it will lose its relevance fast, if it has not already because few know these figures even directly. But the great thing about it was that it is out and available in stores. Unlike some books which have been banned by over enthusiastic goons, this book remains available despite the manner Congressman Tharoor shoots gaily at the Congress bastion. Though I was sceptical at first, I can only applaud the effort now having completed it, and hope that Shashi Tharoor writes more novels, not necessarily of such scale, but even of ordinary things. Simply because he is a damn good writer. And for that matter I don't think anyone else but he could have written this novel. 

Captain Phillips - Movie Review

Should have watched in on screen. Based on a true story of a Somali pirate hijacking 'Captain Phillips' is a taut thriller. The movie runs linearly but the drama is so good, rifles and danger all around, for both sailors and pirates, that one is glued to the movie to the very end.

Captain Phillips and crew are aboard an unarmed cargo ship going round the African coast when they are intercepted by two pirate skiffs on the Somalian coast (makes you wonder why they are unarmed when they know the coast has pirates). One of the skiffs is led by the temperamental Muse and an inexperienced trio of boys who want to make money. While the other skiff backs off upon hearing Phillips bluffing them about air cover etc, Muse chases the ship. The four pirates board the ship and there are tense times on board the ship until the pirates manage to get hold of Phillips and take off in the lifeboat. Now they have to negotiate for ransom. But before that they have to confront the force of Navy Seals and a US anti-piracy unit. As they are stranded in the ocean, running out of the local herb that keeps them alert and active, tempers fly, anything can happen. Can Captain Phillips be rescued in the end?

Tom Hanks is brilliant and so is Barhad Abdi as Muse. The real Muse is apparently in the US in prison while his team is killed. Captain Phillips is back on the ship after having penned down his experiences. Immensely watchable, taut with action and drama.

Book Launch of 'The Americans' by Chitra Viraraghavan in Hyderabad

I met Chitra three years ago when she came to the Hyderabad Literary Festival in 2011 with husband and friend Krishna Sastry Devulapalli, whose debut novel 'Ice Boys In Bell Bottoms' had just hit the market. I was on a panel discussion with Krishna and Vamsee Juluri, who had written 'The Mythologist' then, and we were to speak about all things Hyderabadi to Meena Alexander who ended up speaking more than all of us. But my impressions of Chitra and Krishna are very vivid and we hit it off well and have since stayed in touch. Chitra has always been thoughtful goes the extra mile to get things in order for people she cares about, and I suspect, even for those she may not care. She is kind, warm and a very giving and loving person.

Sridala and Chitra after the launch

I did not know she was working on her own book then. Later I heard she was working on it, though she would not reveal anything about it, and then came to know that she is the biggest chupa rustam of all. Her debut novel 'The Americans', has been published by Fourth Estate, the literary imprint of Harper Collins, which is a statement of the quality of writing surely. I was very happy for her because she is one of those people for whom you do not harbor any other feelings but those of genuine warmth and affection. Yeserday she launched 'The Americans', stunning cover and all, in Hyderabad, at Landmark, Somajiguda, with its fast depleting stocks of books and merchandise. Chitra was in conversation with Sridala Swamy, poet, writer and critic.

I walked in early to meet Krishna and Chitra and found Chitra deep into her fifth or sixth interview. Krishna was speaking with another old friend Radhika Rajamani. I stepped out to meet Vinod at Minerva over coffee and mirchi bajjis and then we made our way back to Landmark. By now a few more familiar faces had come in. Anjan had come despite his busy schedule and I like this part of him where he balances out his life as a senior police official with his other passions. Bijju arrived, Shobhs and Anjali came, AP, Ramaraju. Mohana Krishna, one of my favorite directors, master craftsman and great company, came in despite the busy workload of having just launched his new film project. As I suspected the number of chairs were not enough. I had warned the store manager about it. Luckily he had a back up and got some more chairs in and even thanked me for my early warning.

The event was lively and fun. The discussion was sharp, concise and informal and most of us could figure out what was going on unlike some events where the two people on stage talk as if they are having a private conversation of which no one else can make head or tail of. Sridala asked if the book had autobiographical elements, about the different structure and the unusually large number of characters, why Chitra wrote the book and what she feels about Indian writers in America. Chitra spoke strongly, clearly and conveyed the discomfort she addressed through this effort of hers - of how America rubs itself off on Indians and how what we see is not what really is. There are several other shades too and her attempt was to open up the spectrum and show it like it is. It should bring in much honesty into this aspect of our lives I feel, because it has always been like the new clothes on the emperor - none daring to question it.  Chitra, I am sure, would not have held back and must have delved deep into all the muck that we do not see or do not want to see. It will be another great illusion shattered (where will we go now?), and perhaps its the right time to do that as well.

In conversation

Chitra read a few passages from the book and I loved the one about Shahrukh. In the Q&A Chitra was asked what the message was, and if she has missed out anything from he book which she may have wanted to include. She said that she did have to tone her anger down a bit.

Anjali sat quietly on my knee and watched the proceedings carefully. Anjan looked at her and observed that she was pretty quiet. He asked her if she understood what was going on and she said 'Yes'. By the end of the session it was still good for more which meant that it had good energy and flow. There aren't many book launches that you could have wanted to go on for longer but this was one such.

We picked up the books but to get them signed you must go to the billing counter which is a few miles away. Then once you buy, you walk back all those miles again, thirsting for water, when you have to deal with a menacing security guard who insisted on seeing the bills, proof that we bought the books. Despite the pleas of book lovers like us that we were only getting our copies signed and that we had already paid for the books, the menacing chap would not yield - show me the bill. I am the security, he thundered. I told him to take a walk. He could check the bill at the exit if he wanted. That left him feeling rather upset but that's ok.

Mohan Krishna Indraganti, me and Anjali with Chitra

Signs done, pictures taken, discussions finished, we bid our goodbys. The Landmark Manager came and thanked me for my valuable input about increasing number of chairs. Orange juice and biscuits were served. A good job done.

The event went off well. Good attendance, of about 50. Good conversation. Nice. The dramatic moment of the event was brought in by Krishna for me. Having given six interviews at a stretch and meeting people since 3, Chitra had a minor coughing fit in the middle of her reading. We all looked anxiously at her, listened to her cough in discomfort and looked at the two unopened bottles of water on the table. What? Who? How? And then a rustle, soft as wind. Krishna swiftly strode past an anxious audience, tore open the cap from the bottle and handed it over. Two sips by Chitra and the matter was under control. Sighs of relief from the audience. Krishna to the rescue. Such is the stuff these two are made of. But seriously, lovely couple.

Now to read the book which looks very tempting and promising.

Elections 2014 - The Age of 'Selfies' People

There was a time when our people and leaders looked down upon selfish people. We have come a long way. Now we have adopted the idea of being selfish in every nuance of the word. Typically we have also adopted the misspelled variant of the same - the selfie - and are advertising our selfiesness all over. To vote is to selfie.

I know many who have expressed the lack of forethought in not taking a selfie after the act but then, wait another five years fellows. Google will go and vote for you. It surely knows who you voted for based on all the careless tracks you have left behind and all that it has inferred.

But that's not the real story. The real story is of me and my elections. For long I have been wondering how to prepare and  vote responsible. Even selfishly (the right spelling) because I hate the other selfie (because I look even more like an idiot in those). Any vote has to be selfish I guess and loaded with a what's in it for me and for my country. I looked for candidates and their information, I searched the net, I discussed here and thee, overheard here and there, laughed at the lack of awareness and knowledge at most people and finally on D Day came down to this conclusion.

I probably know about only 3-4 candidates finally of the 30 of Loksabha candidates and 2-3 in the Assembly candidates. Most, even those who were infinitely smarter then me gadget and social media-wise, were surprised to know that I knew a couple more candidates than they did. I could count on my fingers the parties I knew that were contesting and to a far lesser number, the candidates. Where I liked the candidate, I liked not the party performance and where I liked the party, I liked not the candidate. It finally almost came down to an elimination.

All independents were those I never knew of heard of. Why were they contesting at all? All the heavies were known and few gave reason for comfort. It finally came down to the big four or five. And sadly, it was not a choice between two great worthies, even with so many candidates, at both Lok Sabha and Assembly level, as it used to be sometime ago, but a case of elimination and seeing who is left behind. I certainly did not want to choose the most eligible button, the NOTA, though it seemed rather tempting. How are we to progress if our choice comes down to this?

As we stood in the queue, I realised that something had changed over the years. Earlier people would stream in at 10 or so and the early hours would be less crowded. Now at 730, with our new found zeal, the crowd was a hundred long, all wondering what to carry, whether their names were appearing, why the queue was slow etc. From 745 am to 915 am we plodded about in the queue. In sharp contrast Shobhs went at 1 pm and was out in five minutes. There were two gentlemen wearing AAP caps in the queue and were roundly chastised and made to put the same in their pockets. Some carried mobiles.

Today I see many fingers on the facebook, inked, people smiling as if they have been to war and won us famous victories. I saw a story of how one person struggled to find the name and polling station and bravely voted despite the hurdles. I saw news of Modi, our future PM could-be, with a selfie and a lotus and an FIR, Ditto with Naidu who blurted out the secret of whom he voted for. How can anyone prove that he voted for anyone is my question despite what he says. I saw news of Chiranjeevi pacifying Raja Karthik who asked the politician to join the queue and the mega star did join the queue - all done nicely and civilly. Except for some uncivil clapping by our enthusiastic population who are always ready to clap for something or the other and some mega wars on facebook about why Chiranjeevi should have been allowed to vote. It's probably simpler if we have a VIP box and charge a lakh a person. The state could make some money that way and we'd be all spared of this.

I am mostly impressed by Digvijay Singh who was at the bottom of my pile of credible politicians because he is generally making completely illogical statements. Very creative man mind you, because there is no connection between anything two lines he says. But he has got a girlfriend Ms. Amrita Rai, who is very good looking and this has improved his credibility vastly in my opinion. He should have been promoted as the PM candidate for the Congress. He is not a bad looking guy, talks as much nonsense as any capable leader can and has passions. A good looking PM with a good looking spouse is the need of the hour and Diggi could have provided not just many hours of entertainment with his utterings but also provided a sight for sore eyes whenever foreign dignitaries arrived. Diggi also manfully agreed to marry which was very smart of him and which will win him many votes. I am now an unabashed fan of Diggi and will propose his name for PM.

Another thought I had was that since most leaders don't seem to be doing anything anyway, they could at least look good. It might give us some relief.