When the balance tilts completely towards 'what could have been' we're surely headed for unhappiness. It's complete denial from reality while wishing something else.
When the balance tilts completely towards 'what is' we are rather resigned to our state. But what it does is make us live in the present which is good. But it has the danger of not wanting more - knocks out all ambition.
A balance between the two would be great. The tilt should be towards 'what is' because it keeps us grounded. And from there, with roots in the ground, one can aspire to 'What Could Have Been''. Gratitude for 'what is' makes fertile ground for 'what could have been'. Makes even better things happen than what we can imagine.
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