Suresh was our batch mate in Osmania Engineering College (1984-88). I was in the Civil Engineering dept and he was in Mechanical Engineering - which was far removed from the main college so we met only during breaks. We also met a lot at the hostel because we would visit and sometimes stay over with our friends Sanjay and Ali Mumtaz (Room no 5!) at ECH 3. Suresh was always full of life, possessed a raw energy that radiated from his presence and his words and actions. A live wire you could not ignore. A ready smile, quick energy that was ready for action, an enquiring face and a happy demeanour. Of course, he was quick to anger too I believe though I never experienced it. He was always with Kanakaiah whom he would address as 'anna' - his older brother was Kanakaiah's classmate in school or something like that.
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| Pic courtesy - Whatsapp group |
What I do remember of Suresh was his very affectionate nature and manner towards me. I do not remember him calling me by any brotherly names but I sure do get the feeling - he felt we were brothers (and perhaps he told me as much) and I did not feel any different. Warm, respectful, caring, perhaps even a bit worried about my lack of direction or focus. College life ended and then he joined Allwyn where Kanakaiah also joined. My sister Lakshmi was also working there then and was senior to these two by a few years and there were times when they dropped by at home perhaps since Allwyn was close by. Sometime after that Suresh left for the US and then the only times I heard of him was when he visited India and made it a point to meet. The last time was a few years ago when we met at Minerva Coffee Shop at Somajiguda with Kanakaiah. He was in Hyderabad this January and wanted to meet at Deccan Club - but I was too tired and did not go that day. I wish I had.
The other day the OU Whatsapp group came to a sudden standstill when our mutual friend Vinod (who became very close to Suresh over the years, being neighbours at New Jersey) posted a cryptic note - 'Suresh Palli is no more!' I was surprised - he was fit and happy and loved life as I knew it - what had happened to him.
A Whatsapp group was created by Vinod perhaps who certainly was deeply impacted as they practically lived in each other's house. Certainly Kanakaiah was even more impacted who had a deep karmic bond with Suresh. And then so many more friends poured in their memories in the Whatsapp group that was perhaps created to share information about the programs that followed. And in their deep outpouring I realised how Suresh had truly, deeply touched so many lives just by being himself, being more and more himself, something that living in the US seemed to have enabled. He seemed to have discovered so many facets to himself and was discovering even more.
On October 20, 2024, Suresh was running the Detroit Free Press Marathon when he collapsed. He had caught on to marathon running in a big way and that was something Vinod told me about in his last visit. I learned quickly that Suresh had run 54 marathons in just over 5 years, sometimes running 3-4 marathons in a month. Someone shared his marathon history - one each in 2018 and 2019, 5 in 2021, 16 in 2022, 24 in 2023 and 3 in 2024! He travelled the globe for these marathons - Tokyo, Sydney, Athens, Istanbul, Berlin, Mumbai. Kanakaiah said he wanted to be part of the exclusive club of 500 who had run 100 marathons. Vinod said another goal of Suresh's was to swim the English channel.
As each day passed a fresh perspective of Suresh's life revealed itself on the Whatsapp group. What was now a common occurrence of posting an RIP and moving on as we now do mostly, did not happen, as all the people Suresh had met and impacted did not want to move on as easily. They shared and shared.
Pictures of Suresh with each of his friends, family - from three decades ago to now. His love to cook (biryani and salmon), his fondness for hosting people, his great love for his family, his wife Dr Bharathi, daughter Nikki and Arjun, his manner of connecting with families, with children by being accessible and authentic, his larger than life lifestyle, his loving heart, his deep dive into anything that caught his fancy, his love for travel, his way of making things big. Pictures kept popping up - Suresh boating, swimming, on a bike, on a motorbike, at the end of marathons, at the beginning of marathons, hiking, table tennis - he had a demanding physical routine and seemed to love it all.
I don't remember Suresh playing anything during college - he had a good hand and used his calligraphic skills to paint on our election posters - Choudary's too. For him to become so sportive and active as an outdoors person can only be attributed to the life in the USA.
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| A testimonial to his handwriting - pic shared by Dr Ayetla Rajeshwar from their school days at Sarvai; |
As the days went on I was more and more amazed at the amount and intensity of love that poured in for Suresh - the group Suresh Palli had a total of 198 members - friends, family, classmates. One classmate of his Farook remembered calling him Cut Suresh because he would zig zag on his motorbike which he would race even then. His classmates from Sarvail in Telangana which had a good residential school posted their memories. Suresh lost his father while in school when he was 12 years old and joined the residential school and then went to the residential college in Nagarjuna Sagar before joining the Osmania University Engineering College. Someone wrote about his love for dogs, for life. Someone said, NJ will never be the same.
There are some pictures of his 50th birthday party.
Vinod said there was a genetic condition in their family - something which made Suresh even more determined to challenge the condition by becoming physically active, running grueling marathons. That certainly fits his spirit - he never backed away from a challenge and always seemed to challenge life. You can see that in his posture, his eyes, his smile.
One post from the Indian Cartel Group that ran the Dublin marathon soon after Suresh left where they all wore jerseys with his picture on their back in his honour - a gesture much appreciated by other runners in the marathon. Wow, I thought, he has impacted them so deeply to get them to act in his honour. How many get an honour like that.
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| Pic courtesy - Indian Cartel Group |
Then someone posted a facebook post of a lady Lili Damma or some such name who started a tribute for Suresh - she had apparently been running in the same marathon. She paid a tribute with a few flowers at that spot and lit a candle. So many others joined in on that facebook post from that marathon, those who passed him, who remembered him, who heard of it, and they all poured out their hearts. Someone said 'I'll run 5 kms in his honour this weekend' and a whole lot of people joined in saying they loved the idea. Again I could not help but be amazed at the spirit of Suresh that refused to go quietly - pushing people to act. How many of us earn that kind of a tribute? Very few.
More posts. A link to the funeral. He looked like he was sleeping. I could not but notice a resemblance to my father's face with his greying temples and all - he too died at about 60! Suresh at 57! I saw clips of Nikki's speech. Someone posted a video tribute - covering their life together - very moving.
Kankaiah was distraught when I spoke with him. He told me that Suresh went to great lengths to woo his partner Dr Bhaathi. Vinod said he once borrowed his scooter and rode all the way to Nellore to meet her. Long story they both said. He would gift outrageously expensive things to children - a 200 dollar watch on graduation. No holding back there. You need a large heart to hold so much love.
I can only nod and say well lived brother - you really touched so many people so deeply. Words of encouragement, of motivation, of wanting others to do well, to be well. Kankaiah said Suresh would always be upset that I did not make it big in cricket, did not play for the country - they planned on telling me and berating me personally for wasting my talent someday. Can easily imagine him getting upset with something like that - he really wished well for others. Everyone was his own, his family, his sibling.
Kanakaiah said that Suresh once told him that his life and its philosophy can be explained in these two lines -
"From bus pass to boarding pass. From Red bus to Airbus.'
and that
'When the sun rises the next day it is the greatest opportunity to live.'
300 people showed up at the funeral said Vinod - from India, US and so on. I have seen funerals with two people. There is something very special that Suresh achieved with his life and if anything, its perhaps a shout for us to be more authentic, more daring, more loving and more expansive. If I look to take one thing from Suresh that he taught and it will be this - to live life more fully, more generously.
What an innings.
Well played Suresh! Well played brother!
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