I realised it's not easy to find ways to indulge if you are not used to indulging yourself. One can eat food (ice cream, chocolates...always laced with guilt), buy stuff (thought of buying myself a book), do things that pleases oneself. The last category is what I like most, what I feel is my comfort zone because I don't have to spend money and then feel bad. Like walking in grass was one such for me, but I realise I do not have too many such things where I do not need to spend a lot to please myself (vacation, travel).
Cleaning up the bookshelf - Indulgence |
It's exactly here that I need to listen to my small voice and heed to it which I have started doing a bit more in the past decade. I remember the number of times my voice says - buy that fruit, drink coconut water, enjoy that egg puff - and I would just drive past thinking I am not worth it (or that it's not worth my time which is the same thing). But I have started doing it more these days.
Like it might murmur - give the book 'Around India in 80 Trains' to Ajay's daughters who are visiting from the UK (which I did) and that might qualify as feeling good. But I am giving, not indulging myself right? Would getting up early and going to watch the sunrise at Tank Bund qualify? I think so. Perhaps even a chai with Vinod near his house. Or deciding to meet a friend on a whim which happened yesterday. Or deciding to go eat a pesarattu upma for breakfast by myself at Minerva which I probably will today. Or deciding to watch 'Missamma' by myself (which I started last evening!) Or cleaning up the book shelves (did)
Anyway, my indulgence could not go beyond thinking of buying myself 'Nudge' a book I have been wanting to buy (glad I did). But I am also thinking of other ways to indulge myself randomly. Indulge me while I ramble on.
What Money Can Buy
- Book - Nudge, Covenant of Water (bought myself 'Leading Teams' which was expensive but good)
- A massage (easily done - just that I should feel like it which I mostly don't)
- Travel (alone or otherwise) like the trip to Goa which I had planned for a long time but never happened
- Clothes - I went and bought stuff which is not fitting me!!
- Trip to the US - long pending but an arduous and long process which I'm dreading
What Don't Need Money or Much Money
- Pesarattu Upma
- Sunrise at Tank Bund
- Spending quiet, quality time with someone who enjoys the same, someone who makes it easy
- Movie by myself or with someone who would enjoy it as much
- Buying and indulging myself with a fruit diet
- Coffee with Sagar
I feel I don't seem to be doing a great job at this so far but have decided to stick to it and crack it which I think might happen in a month's time. I might have a more sensitised radar by then about what's good for me, and might act on it faster, do what I enjoy and indulge myself. Looks like those small voices again. More on this later.
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