Sunday, July 31, 2011

England's Obsession With Vaseline - VVS Laxman's Edge

Michael Vaughan's tweet that perhaps VVS Laxman had applied Vaseline to his bat to escape being detected by the 'hotspot' technology confirms England's longlasting obsession with Vaseline. Why are the English cricketers so fond of Vaseline that they keep bringing it into all controversies? The Vaseline brand never got so much publicity anywhere else other than from the Brits. The most famous incident that introduced new uses for Vaseline was by John Lever who allegedly applied it to the ball on a tour to India. Now, after probably finding many other uses for the product, Vaseline makes a come back as the product to use to escape DRS. Many youngsters would now I am sure be inspired by Vaughan's inspirational comments.

As far as the incident is concerned, young Stuart Broad has not added in great measure to his fine performance in the Test, by his rather mischievous, subjective and insipid remarks on the issue. To say that he found no Vaseline or liquid on Laxman's bat, an insinuation that clearly says that the Indians can go to any lengths to beat the great English, is as good as one of the Indian players wondering how he suddenly made inroads into the Indian tail after looking rather flat till then! If the hotspot system could not detect a nick, why should we assume that the English players can detect those nicks? Are they better than the hotspot technology? And since only they could detect the nick, maybe they should offer their services as umpires, superiors beings at detecting nicks that they are?

But typical of them, they assume that the opposition always thinks like them. A classic case of 'If you spot it, you got it'. Wonder how many times, the English have used this to escape the 'hotspot' technology? But all in all, from Vaughan to Broad, the English have suddenly lost any support they have had from me, with such nonsense, such childish and irresponsible reactions.

VVS Laxman is a godfearing, upright, gentlemanly cricketer who always lets his bat do the talking. I have known him since he was a lad of 14, as a polite, soft and spiritual young man who if at all, seeks only the help of the Almighty in expressing his talent. He has in many ways, in many games already proven that his style of preparation to play cricket does not include application of Vaseline to the bat to escape nicks. It is my conviction that no one in the Indian team prepares to escape nicks being detected by the 'hotspot' system, least of all Laxman, whose bat would have got the least number of nicks anyway.

There are certain stages in life, in games, that desperate measures are used by desperate men to get under the skin of opponents. Unfortunately certain moves made in the wrong context, can serve to really rally a team that is until then struggling. Vaughan and Broad Co., has precisely done that with their rather ill timed comments. By accusing a clean cricketer like Laxman who is highly respected in the team, they have practically given the Indian team a strong case to get together. A common cause. The tipping point that will galvanise it. Remember what happened to Ponting's Aussies in Perth not so long ago? At Calcutta? And in so many other games in the past - Indians play more on pride and it is dangerous to tread that area.

My prediction now is that the English will lose this series. I was not too sure yesterday at stumps but now I am convinced. The hundred that eluded Laxman will come in this series, the second innings perhaps, and it will be a big one. It would also spur some more performances by the others. At full capacity, England is no match for India, they know that. Having started this scheme, it is time for the English to really find some other uses for Vaseline, a technology they seem to know best about, to escape from this sticky situation. As for Broad and Vaughan, you have just proved what brand of the game you play.

4 comments:

Kiran Kumar Gutta said...

Like boos from Brit crowd motivated Sreesanth, the Vaseline comments on VVS will certainly help in scoring the Match winning century in the ongoing test match.
I request you to spare a thought on Rahul Dravid. For the second successive Saturday Dravid was simply superb. Out of his 34 test match centuries, India lost only twice. He never got due recognition.

Harimohan said...

Absolutely correct Kiran. Rahul Dravid's stats are simply too good, he has always been there when India wanted him - a true champion. No wonder he is the most feared batsman in the Indian batting.

Gautam said...

Heh :) stuart broad said ... "Hot Spot is not showing up the really faint edges, which is a bit of a flaw. I actually sarcastically had a cheeky feel of his edge when the ball went past but there was no
sign of liquids on there."... That's an accusation you think?
When will we actually get out of this mentality of being newly independent and we have to show the world that we are awesome!! Especially our ex imperial overlords... Get over it already, it's been more than sixty years..
This was cheeky, we ( ravi s, sunny g, sourav etc.) could have just replied that as there was nothing on vvs' bat, it must have been the vaseline on the ball put by the english to make it swing!! That's it! One cheeky remark, one retort... End of story.
Why does everything have to be a controversy? We love melodrama (vvs is god fearing... rofl )... Get a grip its just a game, we have been involved in match fixing, ball tampering etc... As have they ... This holier than thou attitude is exhausting frankly... Lastly I have known god since I was 14, he doesnt mind a vaseline joke or two... (the last bit about god was tongue in cheek, please dont write a post about the god controversy)eally faint edges, which is a bit of a flaw. I actually sarcastically had a cheeky feel of his edge when the ball went past but there was no
sign of liquids on there."... That's an accusation you think?
When will we actually get out of this mentality of being newly independent and we have to show the world that we are awesome!! Especially our ex imperial overlords... Get over it already, it's been more than sixty years..
This was cheeky, we ( ravi s, sunny g, sourav etc.) could have just replied that as there was nothing on vvs' bat, it must have been the vaseline on the ball put by the english to make it swing!! That's it! One cheeky remark, one retort... End of story.
Why does everything have to be a controversy? We love melodrama (vvs is god fearing... rofl )... Get a grip its just a game, we have been involved in match fixing, ball tampering etc... As have they ... This holier than thou attitude is exhausting frankly... Lastly I have known god since I was 14, he doesnt mind a vaseline joke or two... (the last bit about god was tongue in cheek, please dont write a post about the god controversy)

Harimohan said...

Fair enough Gautam. Point taken. But there's so much subjectivity about the comment that it does no good for the game. Faint edges that cannot be detected by technology cannot always be detected by the players themselves, so there was no point in Broad or Vaughan bringing it up especially when it was all done and buried.