Friday, April 22, 2011

The IPL Tamasha

And if we did not have enough confusion with the teams and players, we now have anchors confusing the hell out of everybody. So how does it feel? seems to be their favourite question. Be it Sunil Gavaskar, Dhoni, Neeta Ambani, Priety Zinta or the cheerleaders, the anchors have only one question - so how does it feel?

"Your team got 140 - how does it feel? X player went for some runs today - how does it feel? The match is evenly poised - how does it feel? It looks like you'll lose this match also - how does it feel?" I mean how inane can they get.

Then we have women anchors. Archana Vijaya of the falling pallu, or rather well-engineered pallu, who looks quite poised as an anchor - my only problem being that her cricketing knowledge, however hard she prepares, is still short. So everyone adjusts to rather amateurish questions, as she fails to adjust her pallu, and we are all fine.

Or those anchors who trap players as they walk off the ground unsuspectingly to get some wisdom off them. Or those who  hound the team owners with questions on the game - which most team owners find difficult to answer because they don't know the game well enough. But I find it amazing that the team owners - all important people - seem to have the kind of time that they have to follow their teams all over. Its not as if the teams are doing any better by their presence but they insist. Amazing.

If the team owners follow their teams I can still understand it because its after all their money, but when the celebrities run to the matches and act like they are totally supporting their teams when everyone knows they are out there for other reasons like impending releases etc then it makes one want to puke. And in the VIP section of the stadiums one finds the biggest bunch of non-cricketers, fat, puffed up - from cricket administrators to corporate honchos, and more surprisingly lots of busy politicians. Don't they have things to do? I mean how much time must be going waste as they travel up and down to the matches and watch them even as they don't understand them - but anything I guess to be in the right place at the right time.

The only ones who probably know and understand what is going on - the players who are playing this format now - the cricketers are of course earning their bread playing. The others, the experts who know the game but have not played this version are commentating, trying to figure out if what they are saying is really true because they have not experienced anything like it. The other cricketers who know the game more than most at the stadium are sitting at home and watching television because no one gives a damn about them anyway.  With Mandira Bedi now retiring to the expert areas, writing columns in the newspapers, we can safely now look forward to some books, columns and sports shows by Yudi, Sameer, Gaurav, Archana and the gang on their IPL experiences. And see them in expert roles in a few years!

So the glamour comes in from the movies, the power from the politicians and the money from the corporate honchos. And the whole world dances to their tunes - from cricketers to the fans - hoping for more contrived excitement. A tamasha if nothing else!


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