Monday, March 8, 2021

eCanteen Fundas - Our Unconscious Biases on Gender, Caste etc

Our unconscious biases on gender, caste etc! Test them.

https://www.edexlive.com/opinion/2021/mar/05/e-canteen-fundastest-the-extent-of-your-unconscious-biases-18780.html


E-Canteen Fundas: Test the extent of your unconscious biases, they shouldn't influence your decisions





Happy International Women’s Day, Rinku,’ said Rahul.

‘Thanks, Rahul,’ said Rinku. ‘Good to see you support and celebrate gender equality.’

‘But why this special focus?’ wondered Rahul. ‘Women do everything that men do. Where’s the bias?’

‘Okay, answer this popular riddle,’ said Rakesh. ‘A father and a son are involved in a car crash. The father dies. The son’s taken to the hospital in critical condition. On the operating table, the surgeon says, ‘I can’t operate. He’s my son.’ How’s it possible?’

‘The man who died is not the real father,’ said Rahul.

‘Maybe the surgeon was mistaken,’ said Rinku.

‘Wrong,’ said Rakesh. ‘The surgeon was the mother.’

‘OMG,’ said Rahul and Rinku.

‘Don’t worry, most people get it wrong,’ said Rakesh, ‘Thanks to unconscious biases we all pick up in our childhood. These implicit biases influence our decisions unconsciously — like assuming that women are good only for certain jobs. Women have suffered gender bias for centuries, Rahul.’

‘But things have changed, bhaiyya,’ said Rahul.

‘I doubt it, going by your answers,’ smiled Rakesh. ‘In another study, the same CV with a male name and with a female name was given to respondents to judge who was more competent. The majority said the male was. That’s how biased we still are. Ideas that men ‘take charge’ and women ‘take care’ are deeply ingrained and quietly relegate highly capable women to the background while promoting incapable males.’

‘That’s sad,’ said Rinku. ‘How can we counter this, bhaiyya?’

‘By being aware,’ said Rakesh, ‘And testing ourselves on our biases. Take the Harvard Implicit Association Test and test your biases. Or the flip test — put the other gender in a familiar situation and check how you feel. Imagine a man doing all the housework and holding a high-ranking job or a married woman pilot hanging out at the bar. If it makes you feel weird, you have a bias.’

‘But, bhaiyya,’ said Rahul, ‘Are traditional roles wrong?’

‘That’s insecure thinking,’ said Rakesh. ‘By keeping 50 per cent of our population out, humanity cannot grow. To attain our fullest potential as a society, we must eliminate all bias, include women’s perspectives and give everyone their rightful place.’

‘Thanks, bhaiyya,’ said Rinku. ‘Big insight.’

Pro Tip: Our unconscious biases influence our decisions. Be aware. When we allow everyone to flourish on an equal footing, we unleash the real potential of our unit.

Sunday, March 7, 2021

Thought for the Day - When I Reject Myself, I Shrink

 I noticed that when someone says something against me, or even if I perceive that something went wrong and I am involved, I tend to withdraw. I can be having a great time until then and one word or some perceived something will make me withdraw. The book 'The Four Agreements' called it 'Taking it Personally'. It calls it the most selfish thing to do because you think it's about you when it's not. The way forward he says is to not let any emotional poison enter you and remain unaffected by everything.


An ideal state. I'd like to get there.

I also realise that when I am happy, I am in full flow. I am laughing, having fun, light and easy, high on energy. One emotional poison dart and I am down in the dumps. One thought, one word, one feeling. 

I was trying to get to the bottom of that.

The visual that came to me - a very helpful visual indeed - is one where I am in a full state. This is when I am happy and fully aligned with myself. Then an emotional dart hits me (or I hit myself) and then I shrink drastically from my real expanded self. This dart causes my fake and selfish self to shrink and be out of alignment with myself.

This is clearly no use for me.

The visual is helping me find when I am shrinking and out of alignment. I can see a poisonous emotional dart entering me and causing me to shrink. That I know is a state of fear. I can now see how it is not good and how I must quickly expand and return to my original state.

The state of love. 

It's powerful. Working on it now. If I can come out of my lows and rejections and self-imposed hurts, I am saving up a lot of good energy. Wait a bit world, I am coming.

Saturday, March 6, 2021

Thought for the Day - Choice Comes from Love, Reaction Comes from Fear

If we take the love and fear principle (that fear is the opposite of love) and then see how it fits in with another powerful principle (that we are better off coming from a place of choice (or response) than from a place of reaction), we have an even more powerful principle.

Choose the highway to love!

Choice or response, comes from a place of love. Reaction comes from a place of fear.

 To choose freely, without fear, for yourself first and then for others, is an act of love. The more we come from a place of choice, the more comfortable we are in letting go. This leads to easier flow, to trust, joy, lightness of being. 

To react only to the outer world, with almost no choice, is an act of fear. The more we fear, the more we cling and do not want to let go. This leads to heavier or blocked flow, mistrust, sadbess and heaviness of feeling.

Love is choosing for yourself. Fear is reaction.

Choose love.


Friday, March 5, 2021

Thought of the Day - Go Beyond Blame and You'll Find Power

 Most of us react negatively when we feel blamed. We feel like victims and we give up. But blame is going only half-way - when we go all the way we find power.

What is blame really?



When someone says or we feel like we have caused something undesirable, we are assuming that we have the power to create something. Which simply means, we have power beyond the situation. We have done something that no one else could stop or negate.

Now if we take this same thought further, this same power can be used again - to uncreate or create something even bigger than what we created in the first place. If we take this power further down the road from the first stop which is blame and take it to responsibility - we can take it upon ourselves to uncreate what has been done, or even better, to create what we have done.

Next time you feel blamed, take the power further. Go beyond feeling like the victim. Think responsibly and ask - what can I do with my power? What can I uncreate? Or what bigger and more beautiful thing can I create?  

Every time there is something pinned on you, realise that it only means you have the power to change things. It's freeing, empowering and creative.

Atomic Habits - James Clear

The byline says it all - "Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results".  James Clear starts with the example of the British Cycling team that had never won anything major since 1908 (1 Olympic gold and no Tour de France in a century). The new coach Dave Brailsford brings in the concept of 'Aggregation of Marginal Gains'. They broke down everything that goes into riding a bike (the bike, equipment, clothes, mattresses, even the colour of bus etc) and improved it by 1%. When you put all these 1% gains together, you get a significant increase. By 2008 British cycling teams won 60% of the gold medals in the Olympics and later on went on to win 178 World Championships.



The maths behind this - 1% gain every day for a year results in a 37.78 times increase. 1% worse each day results in 0.03 times what you began with. The tiny gains end up making you 37 times better in a year.

James Clear says that to create this 1% change every day you need to focus on systems and not on goals. You do not rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems he says which is absolutely true. He also mentions how a single goal can restrict your happiness, can be momentary while systems help you enjoy every part of the journey. So systems are what you focus on - after setting your goals

Change - At Identity, Systems and Outcome Levels

Change happens at three levels - identity, systems and outcome. If we look at change, in three concentric circles beginning with the outermost which is the what - "The Outcome" change, the second circle which is the how - "the Systems" change and the innermost which is the why - "the Identity change" we understand the wisdom of beginning with "why". If we start with the why - who we want to become - then we figure the 'how' in line with that and we achieve the results we want. True behaviour change is identity change he says. Be proud of who you are. Change the story you tell yourself. Think - who is the type of person you want to be? The ultimate form of motivation is when the habit becomes part of your identity. Once you get your pride involved, your identity will drive your habits. You become your habits. There's no more effort involved.

Why Humans Repeat or Avoid Behaviors 

Studies show that behaviours followed by satisfying consequences tend to be repeated and behaviours that produce unpleasant consequences are less likely to be repeated. Habits are mental shortcuts learned from experience.

Our Feedback Loop

Our behaviour feedback loop is this - Cue- Craving - Response - Reward. Cue (the hint that begins the behaviour) and Craving (intensifying the need for the behaviour) are the problem phase while Response (the action that we take) and Reward (the feeling that we feel after going through with the behaviour) are the solution phase. This is the feedback loop of habits.

James has a simple formula to build and break habits. To build habits - make the cue obvious, make the craving attractive, make the response easy to do and make the reward more satisfying. To break habits go the other way - make the cue invisible, make the craving unattractive, make the response difficult and make the reward unsatisfying. James gives some techniques to build on these.   

                                    To build new habits                            To break habits 

Cue                               Make it obvious                                    Make it invisible

Craving                        Make it attractive                                    Make it unattractive 

Response                    Make it easy                                               Make it difficult

Reward                        Make it satisfying                                    Make it unsatisfactory


Making the Cue Obvious

Have a habits scorecard - write down all the things you do habitually (habits are those you do almost unconsciously) and check them off as positive, neutral or negative. This makes the habit and the cue obvious so you can take action on which habit to keep and which to drop.

Point and call - Since most habits happen without awareness, point and call like the Japanese Railways employees do or airlines pilots do - so it helps you do things with more awareness.

Implementation Intention - To start a new habit the two main cues are time and location. So create an implementation intention - "I will (exercise) at (6 am) in (the gym)". When you clearly write what your intention is, chances are high you will stick to it. There's a study done between three groups which were told to start exercising, were given motivational inputs and were asked to write an implementation intention - the third group acted. 35 to 38% of the first two groups exercised once a week while 91% of the third group exercised once a week (which is almost double the first two groups). 

 Habit stacking - Stack two habits one after another. After (I journal) I will (meditate) for (5 minutes). You can increase the stack so you get good habits going on after another in the same momentum.  

Environment - You can change habits by changing the architecture and making things you need to do accessible and those you wish to avoid, inaccessible. We are guided by our vision so if you want to build a habit, make the thing obvious by and if you want to break a habit, make it invisible. There's a study where people's eating habits were changed simply by changing the position of where water was made available and where soda was made available in the canteen. Many people shifted to water. Make the cue BIG. James uses the principle of one space, one use to build good habits into the mind.

People with the best self-control are the ones who need to use it the least. Instead of will power, they optimise the environment.

Make the Craving Attractive

Temptation Bundling - Bundle your temptations together so it makes the craving attractive. Pair the ones you 'want' to build, with the ones you 'need' to build.

Remember, it's the anticipation - not fulfilment - that drives the action.

Our culture determines our behaviour - we imitate people close to us, the majority and powerful people. So if you wish to build habits, check if you are in the right environment, following the right social media groups, part of the right groups which have the same intention as you have.

Approval, respect and praise bring on repeat behaviour - so figure a way to get those after you perform an action.

Create a motivation ritual. This makes the craving more attractive. 

Make the Response Easy

The big insight here is that when it comes to response, repetition is more important than one large effort. Many small repetitions on a regular basis have a much larger effect than one big effort. Also, we must keep in mind that the human mind prefers to operate keeping the law of least effort in mind.

Quantity versus quality - Always go for more repetitions than less when it comes to behaviour. The study where one group of photography students were asked to click maximum photos without worrying about quality and another group was asked only to click the single big picture showed that quantity people outscored quality people with better pictures.  

Action vs motion - One must also be careful to understand that there is a difference between action and motion. Action produces results while motion is an activity that does not produce anything.

Addition by subtraction - This is a powerful concept - when we take out one point of friction every time, we have a very efficient system.

Keep things within reach (or out of reach) to reduce (or increase) friction 

2 Minute rule - This is a brilliant tool. When you start a new habit, it should take less than 2 minutes to do. Do it for 2 minutes and win the decisive moments tat decide between should you or not. A two minute - walk, talk, read - is easier to handle than big plans. 

Ritualise the process

Commitment Device - Like Victor Hugo who removed all formal clothes from his vicinity so he would not go out and thus committed to writing and finish his book or James himself who locks up his devices or social media account through the week to stay focused, commitment devices force you to work on your priorities.. take advantage of good intention before falling victim to temptation. You can make good habits inevitable and bad habits

Start one time actions for good habits - like starting SIPs so the effort of doing it continuously is reduced.

Make the Reward Satisfying

The basic principle is that what is rewarded is repeated and what is punished is avoided. also, immediate rewards get immediate actions and delayed rewards may not get repeated actions.

There are many actions we take but if the reward is not satisfying and immediate, we don't repeat it. There is the story of how handwashing as a practice was being promoted in Lahore but the problem was that people were aware and were washing but not properly. To make them take the action properly, they used an expensive handwash which gave a nice perfume and some 

To avoid something pay that amount to fund something nice for yourself - like if you avoided a creamy dessert, pay the amount you would have paid for that into your travel fund or buy-something-nice-for-yourself fund. 

To get a habit to stick - feel immediately successful. Celebrate small wins. Build that habit.

Visual measures help - ticks and pins after every success, or after every achievement in the process, keeps you sticking to the habit. The story of how a young banker became successful by starting the day with 120 marbles in a glass jar and after every sales call he would transfer one to the other jar. The visual in the jar prodded him to complete all calls.

Record and monitor each day - Recording and monitoring your progress each day helps keep track. If we make it visible on the board - even more. 

Don't miss twice - To stay on track, be clear not to miss twice. Once is ok, but not twice, or you'll soon fall off.

Find accountability partners - whatever be your work, having an accountability partner helps. Just to stay honest.

Habit contracts - Make Habit Contracts with people around you - make it a rule or the law and enforce it and the habit sticks.

Habit + deliberate practice = Mastery

Habits and Growth

The Growing Habit - James talks of how to grow to the next level we need to follow the Goldilocks rule - push ourselves beyond the current comfort zone and get into the next level. Here, the Goldilocks zone is the zone that is beyond your boredom zone and below your failure zone. The sweet spot comes on the edge of your comfort zone.

Another fine concept he shared is the one about Career Best Effort (CBE) used by a basketball team where every player was asked to improve on their career-best performance by 1%. This growth was tracked and ranked on both skill and performance as well as unsung hero acts where the person did something for the team.

James says we can also stay honest and review our progress by way of an Annual Review  and an Integrity review. But what I really liked was what he stressed at the end about how habits can become part of our identity and can make us rigid.

"In the beginning, repeating a habit is essential to build up your new identity. But those same beliefs can hold you back from the next level growth. Your pride encourages you to deny your weak spots and prevents your growth.

The more sacred an idea is to us, i.e. the more deeply it is tied to our identity - the more strongly we will defend it against criticism. The tighter we cling to an identity, the harder it becomes to grow beyond it.

Avoid making any single aspect of your identity an overwhelming portion of who you are. Keep your identity small. The more you let a single belief define you, the less adaptable you are when things need to change to grow to the next level. When you cling too tightly to one identity, ou become brittle. Lose that one thing and you lose yourself.'

Be flexible. Be like water. Let go of the old identity to embrace the new. And build a new story. 

The hard and stiff will be broken,

The soft and supple will prevail - Lao Tzu  

James says we need to check periodically if our old habits ad beliefs are still serving us. Lack of self-awareness is poison he says. Reflection and review is the antidote.  

...

I loved the book. The idea of 1% improvement every day is brilliant. Needs practice. I am going to do it from today on in my work area, my growth area. The idea of pinning change to identity and not change is superb, the two-minute rule is brilliant as is the one about accountability partners. And of course the one about the environment guiding your behaviours - keep things you want to do handy and hide things you don't want to access. 

Wednesday, March 3, 2021

Anjali - A Representation

 It's been a  year since the school's been shut and Anjali and her friends have not met at all. It's online classes all along and they have been slogging through screens, homework and preparations and stuff. Sometime after the Annual Day I could sense some unease in her. She told me she was unhappy that they now have Saturday classes which she felt left her with hardly anytime. So she wrote a mail to her Principal, Anita aunty.


She asked me if she should send it. I said, yes, by all means. You have every right to voice your thoughts and Anita aunty would be glad to hear from you. But I said, maybe you could also check how the others feel so you know and if a majority of you feel that way, you can all represent your case collectively. So she spoke to some of her friends and turned out they were also thinking on the same lines.

After some to and fro, she finally sent her mail off yesterday. Anita aunty set a wonderful example by promptly replying to her explaining why they have classes and also assuring her that she would discuss the matter with other teachers.

Whatever the consequence, I loved the process and the thinking behind it. I liked the fact that Anjali felt she could represent the case, by herself if need be. If I were a Daksha teacher I would be proud to have made the students feel such freedom and to give them a voice. That's what it is all about - allowing voices to speak up, addressing their concerns and making everyone feel seen and heard. Good job Anita, Daksha and very well done Anjali. Like I was reading in a  book on dramatic writing - a protagonist is someone who takes the lead in any movement or cause. What happens is immaterial - that they could approach their teachers and that the teachers listened to them will do a lot for how they will perceive justice in the world.

PS: A happy outcome - the children got an off the next Saturday!

 

Maara - Movie

 A girl who remembers a fairy tale told by a stranger when she was five years old sees images from the story on the walls of a place she lives in. They are painted by Maara, an unconventional, elusive, do-gooder, bohemian artist and her quest for him takes her to people and places that slowly reveal him and the story behind how he knows her story. Visually very attractive. Madhavan fully looks the part.